Back At One
by C.C. Baptiste
Summary: Time and memories are all Penelope Garcia has left, will she be able to teach the ones closest to her the true meaning of love, or will she let them fall?
1. Chapter 1: Make It Work

**A/N:** _**This idea has been plaguing me since I started working on The Midnight Hour. I was hoping it would leave me, but apparently it is not going to. Sigh! Anyway, I don't own CM or any companies affiliated with Criminal Minds. I hope you enjoy!**_

_**~C.C.**_

_**

* * *

**_**Chapter 1: Make It Work**

**June 6th**

**Alexandria, Virigina**

Zahara Morgan sat quietly on the steps staring out into the backyard. She watched him navigating the backyard, socializing, laughing and smiling at most appropriate time. He was smooth and suave, flirty at all the right times, charismatic and kind. He was perfect and he was hers; supposedly. She was different from all the other girls she had dated. She didn't look like them. They were Barbie dolls- plastic, with fake boobs, fake hair and botox injections. They all ranged from the color of rose-petal-crème to porcelain white. They were the Blue-Eyed Angels, the Harajuki Girls, the females that every man dreamed of sexing and yet she didn't fit the category.

She was a sista. In every sense of the word; from her cocoa-almond-fudge skin tone, to her high cheek bones, full lips and dimpled cheeks. She was lush, thick in all the right places. She was brutally honest and in the same instance she was shy and introverted. Her beauty was extremely understated. She often flew under the radar, but when she was noticed, she became the irresistible vixen. In those moments she was the girl that men eyed, wondering how the sex would be, but knowing that they wouldn't get past that one night.

She deserved better, so she had always looked past them; until she met him. She knew better, than to fall for those beautiful brown eyes, and his x-rated voice, but she couldn't help it. It was the way he smiled at he, the smile that she learned was the infamous Morgan smile. It was the way he said her name as if he tasted every syllable. It was the way he stared at her, as if he was searching the very depths of her soul. It was erotic, it was breathtaking and terrifying all at once and she was instantly hooked. She had fallen for him, put up with his bullshit and married him. And now she was sitting here by herself, angry and miserable, all because she was madly, sickeningly in love with him.

She rolled her eyes as she thought about their argument. It had been no more than an hour ago when they both said some pretty hurtful things to each other. But his words hurt her the most. He married her because she was pregnant. Not because he loved her, but because she was carrying the extension of him and his name. And he wanted to be there for her, because it was the proper thing to do. Not because he wanted her, not because he enjoyed her, but because they messed around and she got herself pregnant.

She wanted to crawl into bed and have herself a really good cry, but she couldn't because it was their bed and she knew she'd smell him and driver herself crazy. She wanted to hate him; she wanted to disassociate herself from him and a part of her, a part of her wanted to teach him to love her, but she knew that he had to learn to do that on his own.

"Zahara, darling, are you okay?

She looked over her shoulder to see her mother-in-law standing behind her. She smiled at her before nodding her head.

"Everything's fine, Ms. P."

"Then why aren't you out there beside your husband."

Zahara looked into her mother-in-law's intelligent eyes and gave her a soft smile. "I think he needs his space."

"You've only been married for six months, how much space does he need?"

Zahara stood slowly as she placed on hand on the railing and pushed herself up. "I don't exactly know, but I will tell you this much. I wish I never got pregnant."

She turned slowly and walked into the house, leaving her mother in law on the steps to ponder her words.

* * *

"Why are you still with her?"

He said nothing as he took a sip of his can of soda. "Bethany, what does it matter?"

"It matters, because I should've been Mrs. Morgan."

He put the can down and looked Bethany over. Everything about Bethany Daniels, screamed "fuck me". And he had. He had fucked Bethany whenever, wherever and he would admit that the sex was spectacular. And while he admitted that the sex was spectacular she still wasn't Zahara. Everything about Zahara screamed "Love. Home. Shelter.". It was in the way she kissed him, nice and slow, lingering to satisfy the taste. It was in the way she treated his mother and grandmother. It was the way she held him when the nightmares took over. And it was definitely in the way she held him inside of her, when they made love. He had only made love to one person in his life and that was her. He knew the first time that she allowed him to touch her like that that he was safe. That he was free. And each time they came together afterwards he found himself longing for her and her touch. She was his safe haven.

"I chose the right woman, Bethany. You just have to accept that."

She saddled up to him, her breast flush against him and smiled. "You know you still want to fuck me, D."

He pushed her off him. "Whilst that may be true. I am still married."

"Do you even love her?"

"Yes, that is the question of the day, do you love Zahara?"

* * *

She lay on her side, her head cradled in the pillows on their bed. She rubbed her stomach and felt the tears fall as she watched their wedding video. It was the best day of her life and ironically, she thought it was the best day of his life. Apparently, she was sadly mistaken. And yet she felt it was real. He looked her in the eyes, eyes filled with what she thought was complete love and adoration and vowed to love her forever. She wanted her forever to last past six months. She wanted to hurry up and have this baby and be done with. After she got herself together, after she got back to work, she'd free him. They didn't have to be married in order to be parents. Kids grow up in single parent homes all the time; they came from divorced and separated homes all the time. And their baby wasn't going to be any different. Hell, she was raised by her father and she turned out great. So, this should be a piece of cake, right?

_Wrong._ Her conscious answered her. Yeah, she grew up in a single home, but her mother had died when she was a kid. Her father never remarried because he loved her mother too much. But the truth was that Zahara wasn't designed to be a single mother. She was designed to love and be loved; to have the husband and the kids, the house with the picket fence and the dog. And she thought that she had it with him. God, how wrong she was.

* * *

He turned to stare at his sister. She stood their arms folded across her chest staring up at her older brother as if he was the petulant child. From her stance he knew that he was in some kind of trouble. He looked back at Bethany and smiled that Morgan smile.

"Of course, I love her. She's my wife for Christ-sakes."

"I'm glad you clarified that up." His sister said as she placed her hand on his arm. "Come walk with me."

He didn't say a word just turned to be guided across the yard. They had walked a little ways before they had reached the gazebo that he had built for Zahara. They both walked up the steps and took a seat on the swing that was installed.

"Be honest with me Xavier, do you love Zahara?"

"I married her didn't I?" He responded.

"Xavier Daniel Morgan.

"Phoenix, where is this coming from? You have never questioned anything I've ever done. So, why are you questioning my relationship with Zahara?"

"Where is she?"

He stood up at the question. "What?"

"Where is your wife, Xavier?"

He took a deep breath and looked out at the yard. "I don't know. "

"I think that's a problem, considering that she's the one that's throwing us this party."

Xavier sighed and looked at his sister, "You act like I'm always supposed to know where she is every second of every day."

"Your father knew where I was every second of every day."

Without blinking he ground out the only words he seemingly knew."I'm not my father."

Phoenix looked past him to see their mother ascending the steps. Xavier turned slightly and felt his mother's gaze solely on him. Phoenix took that as her cue to leave.

"I'm going to go check on, Zahara. Can't have her pushing that baby out too early."

No one said anything as Phoenix disappeared from the gazebo. Penelope stared up at Xavier and saw everything that she loved about Derek staring right back at her. She stepped closer and gave him the mother glare.

"You are so very right about that son. You will never be Derek Morgan."

Xavier stared down at his mother. She was no longer the vibrant blonde she had once been. In fact for as long as he could remember, his mother had never been blonde. Her hair had been a variety of red or brown, but never blonde. She was only blonde in the pictures and in her memories.

"Ma, I don't want to argue with you. I just want to enjoy my day."

"Without your wife, right?"

He didn't respond he just looked at her.

"You shouldn't have asked her to marry you, Xavier."

"I married her, because I wanted my kid to have my name and to protect her."

"So you don't love her?"

"Of course, I love her. She's having my baby, Ma."

A slight chuckle escaped her lips,"For you to be supposedly nothing like your father, you're dumb, just like him."

Xavier never got the chance to ask his mother for clarification, because his phone rang. He looked at it before turning pleading eyes on her. She simply nodded and he answered.

"Morgan." He bit out.

He listened to the person on the phone and sighed. "Now?...No, I promised Zahara that I'd be her when she had the baby. I can't break my promise to her."

Another sigh escaped his lips as he looked up at the ceiling and sighed. "Yeah, I'll be there within the hour."

He hung up the phone and looked over at his mother who was staring at him expectantly. "Mommy."

She held up her hand and shook her head. "She's your wife. Not mine."

He kissed her forehead, "Ma, come on. I gotta go."

"She's your wife, Xavier. You owe her at least that much respect."

He hated when she was right, and for the record she was always right. He had to say goodbye to her at least. "Call me if anything happens to her."

"Why should I?" She asked him.

"Because like it or not, she's still my wife and my responsibility."

With that Xavier stepped off the gazebo and headed back towards the house, leaving his mother with his words. Penelope took a deep breath before stepping down unto the grass, she looked up towards the sky before clasping her hands into prayer.

"Derek, I don't know where you are, or if you can even hear me, but I need you to get your son and do whatever it is that Daddy's do. And I'mma need you to do it now, because he's about to lose the best thing that's ever happened to him."

* * *

Bethany slipped up the stairs and into the master bedroom to find Zahara lying across the bed. She took all of her in. She stared at her Senegalese twisted hair and the tear stained face and wondered what the hell Xavier saw in her. In her personal opinion the girl had nothing on her. Their marriage was a mistake and she was going to be the one to correct the problem.

"Can I help you?"

She turned to become face to face with Phoenix Morgan. She smiled softly as she tried to figure out her lie.

"I was, um, looking for the bathroom."

Phoenix raised a perfectly arched eyebrow in disbelief. "Downstairs by the backdoor."

She laughed slightly. "The house is so big, I got lost."

"Right, well let me show you where the bathroom is."

Phoenix didn't wait for her to agree she just turned around and walked down the stairs. When they got to the bottom and pointed out the bathroom. Phoenix took hold of Bethany's arm.

"I'm only going to say this one time. Stay the hell away from my brother."

Bethany laughed, "And if I don't."

Phoenix stepped to her and smiled. " Little girl, don't test me. Because I will be quick to show you why I have a CCW. And trust, I always carry."

Phoenix moved her arm to show the gun holster that she was wearing. "Now what you know about that?"

The glass door opened and Xavier strolled in. He stopped as he saw the two of them standing by the bathroom. He took in Bethany's body language and knew that something was admiss.

"What's going on?" Xavier asked as he walked closer.

Bethany batted her lashes and smiled. "We were just having girl talk, right Phoenix?"

Phoenix looked at her and scoffed before turning to face her brother. " I don't like her, Zay."

Xavier stared back at her confused. "You don't like who?"

Phoenix looked back over her shoulder, "Her."

"Phoenix."

She held her hands up in a gesture of god-will "We good, I just let her know how I deal with strays I don't like," She turned back to look at Bethany. "Don't heed my words if you want. But, I will gua-ran-tee you, I will set this piece off and it'll be on like 'Chitty-chitty- bang-bang'. Ya dig."

Under any other circumstance Xavier would have laughed, but he knew better. Phoenix was deathly serious. He placed his hand on his sisters shoulder and gave it a light squeeze.

"That's enough Sista Souljah, I think she's got the point," He said as he walked away

Phoenix shook her head as she stared at Bethany. "Naw, I don't think so, Zay. I truly believe that I'm going to have to shoot her."

* * *

"Zahara!" He yelled as he ran up the stairs.

He received no answer as he reached the landing. He pulled his shirt off as he turned the corner into the bedroom before yelling her name again. He tossed the shirt into the hamper as he kicked off his shoes. He moved further into the bedroom taking off his jeans. He tossed them across a chair as he moved to the bathroom.

He called her name again right before he stepped into the shower. Still no answer. He turned the water on and sighed. He was truly starting to hate this. He'd give it to Zahara, she was the queen of the silent treatment. She could go days on end without speaking to him. He had learned that early on in their relationship. She'd let him stew in his own shit until she had processed it and was ready to deal with. He also learned that her silent treatment was the quiet before the storm. And the one thing he did not want to deal with ever was Hurricane Zahara. He had seen Zahara in action one time and that was when she had verbally ripped his step-father a new one. It was beautiful and he had to admit that it was at that moment her felt that he was truly in love.

He finished his shower and grabbed a dry off towel, wrapping it around his waist before her entered the bedroom. He stepped in to find his clothes, gun holster, handcuffs, phones, credentials and wallet laid out on the bed. He stopped short and looked around the room. No Zahara. He quickly dressed and turned to leave the room when he heard a voice. His voice and it was quivering. He turned to find himself on the television, stroking Zahara's cheek on their wedding day.

* * *

_She was beautiful. That was the only thought that ran through his head as the pastor began to perform the ceremony. Her skin glistened underneath her gown. In that moment he realized more than anything that he loved everything about her. From her smile to the way that she smelled, everything about her was infectious. He smiled a soft smile as tears ran down her cheeks. He lifted his hand as wiped the tears away with the pad of his thumb._

"_Zahara, my love," He said softly. _

_She looked at him earnestly waiting to hear the vows that he so eloquently prepared. And yet, he didn't want to say anything, he just wanted to kiss her, to hold her until the end of time. He cleared his throat and prepared to say his vows._

"_Zahara, my love. You are my greatest gift, my greatest joy," He said his voice cracking the entire time._

_Zahara gave him a soft encouraging smile and he smiled back continuing. "I bring myself to you this day to share my life with you. You can trust my love, for it is real. I promise to be a faithful mate, and to unfailingly share and support your hopes, dreams, and goals. I vow to be there for you always."_

_And without warning tears begin to run down Xavier's cheeks his voice wavering even more. "When you fall, I will catch you; when you cry, I will comfort you; when you laugh, I will share your joy. Everything I am, and everything I have is yours, from this moment forth, for all eternity. For you are my earth, the barer of my seed, my queen."_

_* * *  
_

He paused the tape and stared at himself. He had stood before God, their family and friends and spoke the words from his heart. He had lied to her earlier. He married her not because she was pregnant. He married her because he had loved her. He knew he loved her the moment she walked into his life, she was his breath of fresh air.

He dropped the remote control as the breeze pushed into the room. He stared at the opened French doors and crossed the room to step out onto the balcony. He found her sitting their quietly staring out onto the street.

"Zahara, my love."

She turned slightly to look at him and his heart dropped. Her face was swollen and her eyes were puffy and red and he knew instantly that it was his fault. He kneeled beside her and placed his head in her lap. He placed his hands on her stomach and rubbed slightly. The flutter of his child kicking his hand brought a smile to his face. He continued to rub lightly, before pressing soft kisses to her belly.

"Don't you have to go in?" She asked as she stared out into the horizon.

He lifted his head. "Yeah, I do."

"Well then, I won't keep you."

He rose to his feet and stared down at her. She wouldn't look at him, she kept herself distant from him on purpose. He gently clasped her chin in his hand before leaning down to give her a kiss on the lips. She accepted it, before rubbing her hand against his cheek.

"Be safe. Come back to me in one piece. Do you hear me Xavier Morgan." She murmured softly against his lips.

"I hear, you love."

"Xavier, I mean it," Zahara's voice was raw from emotion. "Come back in one piece."

He stared down at her. "I promise. Zahara, despite all that I had said; you do know I love you, right?"

She stared at him, " I love you, too, Zay." She paused as she kissed his fingers," I love you too."

"I gotta go, but I'll be back soon."

She simply nodded and he kissed her one last time before heading out the door.

* * *

Xavier grabbed his ready bag and keys before heading down the steps. He entered the living room to see his mother and sister sitting in the living room talking with their step-father. He glanced at his step-father before looking to his mom.

"I just wanted to let you know that I'm heading out. I should be back in a couple of hours. Call me if anything happens to Zahara," He said as he placed kisses both on his mom's and sister's cheek.

"Will do," Phoenix replied.

Xavier turned to walk out the house when his mother called his name.

"Xavier." Penelope said softly.

He stepped back into the living room. "Ma'am."

"Have you forgotten your manners?"

Xavier looked at her and smiled. "No ma'am."

"Must have, you've forgotten to speak to your father."

Xavier's eyes flashed as he turned to seize up his step-father. "My father died twenty-six years ago. And as far as he goes I don't speak to unwanted guest in my home."

Phoenix quickly rose and grabbed Xavier's arm. "C'mon Zay. I'll walk you out."

"I can see myself out. You just take care of my Baby Girl."

Xavier turned to leave just as Penelope took a deep breath. He slammed the door behind him, not knowing that he had just unlocked Pandora's box. He ran down the steps and walked the path to the driveway, whistling to himself.

"Zay!"

He stopped and looked up to see Zahara leaning against the railing.

"Yeah, baby."

She tossed down a small gray box that he caught in his hand. "Happy Birthday, baby."


	2. Chapter 2: The Best I Ever Had

A/N: Once again I don't own Criminal Minds or any companies therein affiliated with the show, but if I did, You'd see a few scenes like these. Please leave your comments and concerns.

~C.C.

* * *

**Chapter 2: The Best I Ever Had**

_Twenty-Eight Years Earlier_

**January 23rd**

**Quantico, Virigina**

"Derek, what's going?" She asked as she slid into the booth.

He diverted his attention from the newspaper in front of him to her face. Her hair was pulled back off her face, pinned in a beautiful top knot with soft tendrils of blonde hair falling down around her face. Today, she was wearing a pair of black rhinestone cat-eye glasses. Her lips were fuller than usual, due to the cherry red lipstick she wore. She was dressed casually in a green knit sweater that showed off her ample bust and a black a-line skirt that caressed every one of her curves. He gave her a half smile as he placed the paper down.

"What makes you think something's going on, Baby Girl?"

"Because you're supposed to be in Chicago."

He licked his lips and smiled. "Am I?"

Penelope picked up the menu, "Don't play with me Derek Morgan. I scheduled the tickets, I should know.

He picked up his coffee cup and took a sip, "Indeed, you did Mama."

She glanced at him over the menu,"Did you order all ready?"

"What I want isn't on the menu."

She paused before bringing the menu down, "Then what are we doing here? We can go somewhere else to eat."

He simply smiled as he grabbed her menu, "No, we can't. It's not food that I want."

She gave him a confused look, before asking the obvious question, "What is that you want?"

He stared at her for a moment before giving her a small soft smile, "Isn't it obvious, Baby Girl. I want you."

* * *

_"We shouldn't be doing this." She murmured as his tongue flickered across her navel._

_ He lifted his head up and smiled at her. "Give me one reason why?"_

_ "Because you're not my boyfriend."_

_ He slid his body down, gripping her thighs in his hands as he lead a path of kisses down. "Okay, maybe I should've said a good reason."_

_ "Me having a boyfriend isn't a good reason?"_

_ He paused as his hands ran over her thighs and down to her ass. He looked up at her as he gripped her ass, pulling her down onto his mouth. "No, not at all."_

_* * *  
_

"Derek, you don't want me," Penelope replied softly. "You just want to recreate a moment that we shared."

"Am I wrong for that?" He replied.

"I have a good man in my life, Derek. We already had our moment and that ship has sailed."

He didn't say a word, just stared at her wondering why he subjected himself to her. He did things to Penelope, for Penelope that logically didn't make sense. They had a weekend together, a weekend where they weren't Derek Morgan and Penelope Garcia, best-friends extraordinaire. They had a weekend where they were lovers; passionately seeking one another to make themselves feel whole. Derek wanted a sense of normalcy and Penelope wanted freedom. They had found that in each other.

And yet, for Derek it wasn't enough. It would never be enough.

"Why don't you think I want you?"

Penelope sat back and sighed, she really didn't want to do this with him."Because you don't do, relationships and I am a relationship kind of girl. I want forever and you want right now. I need my right now to be forever."

"Forever, is never guaranteed Baby Girl."

"But when you love someone, Hot Stuff, it is always guaranteed, always."

* * *

**June 6th**

**Alexandria, Virginia**

_Forever is never guaranteed Baby Girl._ Back then she wouldn't hear of it. She had wanted it all; the knight in shining armor, the romantic whirlwind love affair, but what she didn't see was that love was never what it was cracked up to be. In the end they both were right. She ended up having the knight in shining armor and the romantic whirlwind love affair. Yet, she never got her forever with him. She got her forever with a man who would never hold a candle, to her Derek, her Sweetness, her Hot Stuff. She had experienced passion with one man and was destined to live a life of emptiness with another.

Her passion died with Derek and yet her love lived in their children. She sighed as she thought o them, Xavier and Phoenix, her twins. God had blessed her with two of them. No, they weren't her only children, but they were Derek's. They were the reason why she was still alive, why she was a mother and a pending grandmother.

She had raised them to have her spirit and their father's resilience; her warmth and their father's tenacity. She taught them that there was nothing that they couldn't get through and they had descended from greatness, from heroes who gave their lives to protect the world they lived in. In theory she believed that she was paying proper homage to them, but what she was doing was ultimately creating a divide within her household, the _us_ vs. _them _complex.

Xavier and Phoenix's were Derek's children. Xavier and Phoenix were both a light golden brown in color. Yet, Xavier seemingly was made in Derek's image. He had his father's build, his dark penetrating eyes, thick bushy eyebrows, charismatic smile and dimples that winked when he smiled. He was slightly taller than his father, more muscle bound, but he carried his father's serious nature deep within him. He was a protector, purely male with no fears. No deep dark secrets that haunted his childhood. He was an athlete like his father, but instead of football. He ran track and played soccer.

On the other hand there was Phoenix, she had been a perfect mixture of her parents. She was athletic like her father, yet nerdy like her mother. She was kind and generous, fiercely independent and mentally and physically strong. She was beautiful in every since of the word. Her long brown hair had always been naturally curly. She had her mother's lips and her father's eyes. Her voice followed with the soft cadence of her mother's and her words carried the biting edge of her father's. She was her own woman, a hundred and ten percent.

Yet, when it came to the Morgan twins, Penelope was vulnerable. They were her oldest, but she was overly protective of them and as the descendents of the last Morgan man in there line, she felt that she had the right too. Penelope had instilled in them that no matter what happened that they would always have each other. And they understood that. Yes, they had Aunts and Uncles and a Grandmother, and they even had really great friends, but they only had one Mom and one Dad. Their father was already gone, so in theory all they had was Penelope. And if anything ever happened to her, then they would be on their own.

That wasn't the case with Paige and Kaleb. Paige, the blue-eyed, blonde haired angel and Kaleb, the All-American sweetheart; if anything happened to Penelope, Kevin and his family would make sure that they were taken care of properly. The four of them were all hers, but she found herself being partial to Xavier and Phoenix and Kevin found himself being partial to Paige and Kaleb. She had told herself it didn't matter, but as he looked back over their life together. It had always mattered. Penelope overly compensated her twins, because she felt she had to make-up for the greatness that Derek Morgan was. She made up for what Kevin lacked in compassion and understanding for Xavier and she did her best to soothe the fears, where Kevin could not do it for Phoenix.

"I do not believe him," Kevin stated to Penelope. "I took that boy in my house, I raised him as my own and he has the audacity not to speak to me."

Penelope lifted her head from her interrupted thoughts, "Did you raise him as your own, Kevin?"

He looked at his wife who was slowly thumbing through the photo album in her lap. He watched her silently as her fingers rested on a picture of Derek. He felt his blood boil as she allowed her fingers to trace his face. He stiffened as she sighed and moved over to the next picture. He still hated Derek Morgan. Derek had been out the picture for twenty-six years and he still held a place in Penelope's heart. A place that he, apparently, was not welcome and that in itself pissed him off to no end.

"What's that supposed to mean?" He asked her as she turned another page.

"Why didn't you ever take Xavier fishing?"

Kevin sighed, "What are you talking about?"

"When Kaleb turned thirteen, you took him fishing. You talked about it being a rite of passage. Why didn't you ever take Xavier fishing?"

He paused and looked at the woman whom he seemed to have loved forever. She had finally looked away from the pictures and was staring him directly in the eye. He gave her a soft smile and responded.

"Xavier, didn't express an interest in fishing, besides the trip was a Lynch rite of passage into manhood."

"And yet you raised him as your own," Penelope replied softly.

Kevin had the audacity to look contrite. Penelope closed the photo album and pulled it close to her heart.

"I didn't realize until today, how hurt Xavier was. I mean, all this time I thought that I was giving him and his sister the best. I raised them with two loving, doting parents. I paid attention to them and I loved them unconditionally. God, how I love them. They were the reason why I woke in the morning, the reason I breathed. And I promised to give them things that Derek and I never had. "

Her voice had almost become a hushed whisper as she turned and stared at Kevin. Her brown eyes softening full of love and regret.

"I hurt my babies when I married you, Kevin. I thought that I found love and compassion in you. And what I found was that you loved me, but you loathed my babies. A part of me knew that marrying you, that loving you, was going to be a mistake. But you seemed so safe and I couldn't afford taking anymore risk. My life changed drastically when I became a mother. It was no longer about me. It was about them."

Penelope felt the tears swelling in her eyes, but she refused to let the tears fall. She bit her lower lip and closed her eyes as the tears touched her lashes. She took a deep breath to calm her nerves.

"In giving them that two parent home, the sacrifice was that they were raised by me. I disciplined them, I took them to doctor's appointments, I shopped for their school clothes, I planned their birthday parties and bought their Christmas gifts, alone. I married you, because I loved you and because I wanted them to experience the happiness that Derek and I had missed as kids. And yet, Xavier still didn't have a father to teach him how to be a man, to play catch with him in the yard, to teach him about the birds and the bees. And Phoenix didn't have a father to hold her after her first love broke her heart, or to escort her to the father –daughter dances, or to even walk her down the aisle when she gets married. And as cliché and suburban as all of this sounds; I promised myself that my babies would have that. "

"I never neglected them, Penelope. When I married you they became part of my family as well. You know that."

Penelope just shook her head, "If Kaleb needed anything, he knows he can come to you. Could Xavier come to you?"

"Of course," Kevin replied. "I'd do what I can to help."

"Does he know it?"

"He's my son, Penelope."

"Is he? Do you claim him with every bit of love that you claim Kaleb? Do you claim Phoenix with every bit of love as you claim Paige?"

Kevin stared at her and shook his head for a moment, "Where is all of this coming from, Penelope? What does it matter?"

"What does it matter?" She snapped as she rose to her feet. "What does it matter? Do you realize that not once have I said 'we 'throughout this conversation? Kevin, _I_ raised Xavier and Phoenix. _We_ raised Paige and Kaleb. Paige went to the debutante ball and her father escort her to her very first father-daughter dance. Phoenix had Hotch take her. You've taken Kaleb fishing and your dad has taken him hunting. Xavier's been fishing with Jack and Hotch and Rossi has taken Xavier hunting. And for the record Xavier_ loves_ to fish. Do you not see the problem with this?"

Kevin stood and looked at her. " Yeah, the problem is Derek Morgan. This all goes back to Derek. The man has been dead for twenty-six years and he still has the ability to ruin my life."

Penelope's eyes narrowed at him, "Ruin your life? If it wasn't for him, I wouldn't even be alive. If it wasn't for him there wouldn't even be a Xavier, a Phoenix, a Paige, or a Kaleb. And it damn sure wouldn't be an us. So, don't you dare say, that Derek Morgan ruined your life. He gave you your family, Kevin!"

* * *

_Twenty-Eight Years Earlier_

**January 23rd**

**Quantico, Virginia**

"P, love doesn't equal forever and it doesn't save all," Derek said as he resumed reading his paper.

Penelope reached over and pulled the paper down, "Morgan, love is a powerful thing. It is able to conquer all. "

He stared at her for the longest time before folding his paper and sitting up. "If love conquered all, Baby Girl, explain to me, why we keep going through this same old song and dance."

"Derek what the hell are you talking about?"

"I'm talking about the fact that I'm trying to tell you I love you, Penelope."

She smiled at him. "I love you too, Derek."

He stared at her. "No, you don't. You don't love me the way that I love you."

She raised an eyebrow, "What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

Derek leaned back in his seat and took a deep breath. He knew that he was going to need the strength to get through Penelope, because today she was extra dense. He stared at her, biding his time as his fingers strummed across the table. He finally stopped strumming and reached for his wallet.

"It doesn't mean, anything, P," He said as he tossed a couple of dollars on the table.

"It must have meant something, you brought it up."

Derek stood and looked down at her. "Listen, you were right. I'm not the settling down type of guy and you deserve to have your own little bit of happiness."

"And what do you deserve, Derek?"

He leaned down and kissed her cheek before whispering in her ear. "To let you be happy, Penelope."

He brushed a hand across her cheek, "I'll see you when I get back."

She simply nodded and he walked away. Penelope didn't bother to follow him with her eyes, didn't bother to look out the window and watch him leave. Instead she sat silently, biting the inside of her cheek as she steeled herself not to cry.

* * *

"_You ever wonder what heaven feels like?" She asked as she listened to his heart beat._

_He didn't say anything, he just looked down at her. He allowed his fingers as he allowed his fingers to dally in her hair. He didn't know how to answer the question. Rather, he didn't truthfully want to answer the question. So he settled for the next best thing._

"_When I was a little kid," he finally said._

_She tilted her head and stared up at him, her eyes asking the question. He looked back at her and sighed. This was the reason why didn't want to answer in the first place. She was going to make this more complicated than it had to be._

"_I thought it must've been spectacular because my Dad chose to go their instead of staying here with us."_

"_What do you think now?"_

_He paused before answering her. "You really want to know the answer to this?"_

_She simply nodded._

"_I think that it's courageous to die for a cause you rightly believe in. My dad died on the side of justice to protect those, who just couldn't protect themselves."_

_* * *_

**June 6th**

**Alexandria, Virginia  
**

_I think that it's courageous to die for a cause you rightly believe in. _ His words ricocheted through her mind as she stared at Kevin. She wondered would he consider her courageous. After all she was dying a slow and painful death, staying married to Kevin. She knew from the instant the thought came that Derek wouldn't ever find her courageous. Not the kind of courageous he needed her to be anyway.

"After all this time, you still love him."

Penelope's eyes met Kevin's as he stared at her. She smiled slowly as she stopped and stared back at him.

"I'll always love Derek, Kevin."

She waited a beat before finishing her sentence.

"He's the best I've ever had."

Kevin didn't say a word as he exited the living room. She stood their silently as she listened to his footfalls lead him out the front door. She released a breath and sighed as the door slammed shut. She leaned back and opened the photo album in her lap. She thumbed through it until she got to one of the last pictures taken of Derek.

She stared down at the image of him. His face was tilted at an angle, a measure of him looking down at him cradled in his arms and him looking up at the sky. His hands were resting on her swollen stomach.

She would always remember that day for rest of her life. It was one of the last times she had spoken to him.

* * *

_"Penelope," He said softly as they watched the sun set._

_"Yeah, Derek," She replied as she leaned closer to rest her head on his chest._

_He opened his mouth to speak when his cell phone went off. He rolled his eyes as he answered._

_"Morgan? Yeah, J.J. she's right here." He looked down at her as he kissed her forehead. " We'll be there within the hour."_

_He hung up the phone and looked down into her questioning eyes. "Duty calls."_

_"I know." She replied as she leaned off of him. _

_He slowly stood and dusted his clothes off, before helping her up. He clasped both of her hands in one of his pulling her to him with one quick yank. She leapt into his awaiting arms and he kissed her softly, slowly._

_"Derek."_

_"Yeah, baby." He murmured as he inhaled her scent."_

_"What were you going to say to me?"_

_He tilted her head back and smiled. "It's not important. I just wanted you to know something."_

_"What's that, handsome?"_

_"Know that I love you. Always and forever."_

_* * *_

She tilted her head heavenwards for the second time that day.

"I love you too, Derek. Always have. Always will.


	3. Chapter 3: Redemption Song

**Chapter 3: Redemption Song**

**June 6th**

**Quantico, Virginia**

Xavier Morgan sat at the table and stared at his boss. It was clear, very clear from the mutinous expression that was upon young Morgan's face, that he was not pleased. Media Liaison Michelle Gideon stepped into the room, files ready to hand out. She handed one to Xavier who promptly handed it back to her.

"I don't need the file, Chelle. I'm not working the case." Xavier said as he slowly rose to his feet.

All eyes turned towards him. Never in the two years that Xavier worked in the B.A.U had he ever turned down working a case, clearly it was not an option. However, the look of defiance shone in his beautiful brown eyes, he was serious.

"Morgan if you walk out of here, you might as well place your credentials and you gun on my desk."

Xavier turned and stared up at his boss. "If that's the way you want it."

Without a second thought Xavier unclipped his gun and placed them on the table before Dr. Spencer Reid, before walking out the room.

"I knew he couldn't hack it." Shiloh Neverson said as he opened the file.

All the other agents murmured their agreement when Spencer Reid stood and cleared his throat. "Neverson, it isn't always about hacking it. This case is very personal to Morgan."

Spencer didn't have to say anymore because on the first page of the file was the photograph of deceased SSA Derek Morgan. Spencer excused himself from the briefing and stepped out into bullpen just to see Xavier packing up his desk.

"So, this is it?"

Xavier looked up from his packing to see Jack Hotchner standing by the edge of the desk. Xavier simply nodded before he slid open the next drawer.

"You can't keep running, from him, Xavier."

"I'm not running from my father, Jack."

"Then what is this about?"

Xavier rose to his full height and stared at Jack in the eye. "Are you coming to me as a friend or as a collegue?"

"I'm your friend first, Zay."

"This is about Zahara."

Jack stared back at Xavier confused. "What does Zahara have to do with this?"

"I can't do what my father did to my mother, to Zahara."

"Who says that you're going to die?"

"I don't have time to play Russian Roulette with my life, Jack. I have a wife and kid on the way. It's not about me anymore, it's about them."

"You do know Zahara understands the kind of career you have, right?"

"Just like your Mom, understood the kind of career your Dad had, right?" Xavier shot back at him.

Jack stared at him for a moment before responding, "You're going too far, Zay."

Xavier stopped packing, "You ever wondered what would've happened if our father's had put their families before the job, just one time?

"It doesn't change the fact that their gone, Xavier."

"Yeah, it does, because I don't want my kid having this conversation with some other's Agent's kid thirty years from now."

"Xavier."

"Jack, I told my mom when I was 13, that when I got older I didn't want to be anything like my father and I meant it, because I didn't want to subject her, Phoenix or my wife to the kind of pain I saw in my mom. She _still_ longs for him. She used to cry for him in the middle of the night, when she thought we were sleeping. I'm not going to subject my wife to that. I just can't."

* * *

**Alexandria, Virginia**

Phoenix Morgan sat quietly on the front porch, sipping on a glass of Moscato, tuning out the afternoon festivities. She had to admit that Zahara knew how to throw a party. No expense was spared. They had danced and partied into the early evening and all she wanted was a little peace and quiet. She retrieved her glass as she tucked her leg under her on the glider and took a sip before her eyes focused on the Yukon Denali that pulled into the driveway. She took another sip as the riders stepped out of the vehicle and made their way to the walkway.

There were five of them in total; all related and all of them handsome is sin. She kept her eyes focused on the oldest in the group. His salt and pepper colored hair hung down his back in thick rippling waves. He dark midnight colored eyes seemed to have the propensity to look directly into her soul. Ever since she was a kid, he had the uncanny ability to read her mind. He knew when she was hurt, physically and emotionally and he was always there to offer comfort her. He had told her when she was little that his was job to know that about her. After all he was her godfather. He eased onto the porch and opened his arms to her. And just like when she was a little girl she leaped into them, finding the comfort that she had so readily missed at home.

"Hey, Phoenix-bird, what's wrong?" He asked, his voice rippling like thunder.

"I miss him. All I have is memories of someone I never met," She murmured into his big burly chest, "Daddy Malcolm, I miss my Daddy, very much."

* * *

**Quantico, Virginia**

Dr. Spencer Reid descended the stairs and watched as Jack left Xavier to finish packing. He approached cautiously, his eyes focused on every one of Xavier's movements. In his 30+ year career with the F.B.I. Spencer had never worried about any of his colleagues, he had learned to accept them and he also learned that emotions were not allowed to grow where he worked. However, when it came to Dr. Xavier Morgan, the second youngest person to ever join the B.A.U. he was constantly worried. Xavier was the spitting image of the man that he had once considered to be his big brother and he had promised Derek that he would always look out for him. Which is one of the main reasons he told Xavier he could drop off his badge and credentials; in his heart of hearts he knew that Xavier wasn't made out for this job. His life didn't permit that.

He stopped short of Xavier's desk and watched as the younger Morgan sat down in his chair and stare of the picture of his mother and father. It was a simple shot, one of a six-months pregnant Penelope sitting on Derek's lap. Her head was resting on his shoulder and she was giving him the googly eyes. Derek's right hand was resting on her belly and he was staring at her as if she was the best thing that ever happened to him. And in retrospect, it was true. Penelope's pregnancy had changed not only Derek, but the members of their team forever.

"I often wondered would I ever be half the man, he was."

Spencer lifted his head out of his reverie to see Xavier staring at him. In his hand he held a gray jewelry box.

"Why would you wonder that? You do know that each generation is supposed to be smarter and better then the next."

Xavier just smiled, "My mom used to tell me and Phoenix that all the time. She would tell us bedtime stories of the great Derek Morgan and the Adventures of the B.A.U. When she would tuck us in, I would ask her, was he really that great. She would smile and say, "He was the best at what he did." I never bothered to ask her what that meant. I think I always understood that phrase, but I always wanted some kind of clarity."

"You wanted to know if he died for all the right reasons."

Xavier simply nodded,"I know that he took an oath to protect those who couldn't protect themselves, but who was supposed to protect him?"

"Xavier, that's not a fair question to ask."

"I know. But, it is the one question that I have asked myself every day since I was a little kid. And it didn't dawn on me until the day that Zahara told me she was pregnant, what the answer was. It was my mother. She protected him by giving him the things he couldn't obtain on his own."

Spencer didn't say anything just stared at Xavier as he leaned back in the chair. Xavier tossed the jewelry box in the air and caught it, the soothing sounds of the catch and toss played rhythmically in his hands. Xavier finally stopped catching the box and stared at Spencer.

"I need closure and I realize that whatever I was searching for, is no longer here for me at the B.A.U. I took the job, because I needed to prove to myself that I was _his_ son; that I had the strength to endure anything. Lately, I've been questioning my whole purpose and I know that my purpose is to be alive for my baby and to give them the life that Phoenix and I didn't have with our Dad."

"You know that your father loved you, right?"

"If I don't know nothing else, Dr. Reid. I truthfully, know that we meant the world to him. Which, is why I'm going to work this case."

Spencer raised an eyebrow and watched as Xavier opened the jewelry box in his hand. Xavier handed the box to Spencer. Inside was a gold St. Christopher medal.

"I asked for a sign. I asked my dad for a sign as I was packing my things. Something told me to open that box. And I did. Zahara gave it to me as I was leaving."

"Xavier-"

"My Dad, had owned one just like it. He wasn't wearing it the day he died. He gave it to my mom."

Spencer handed the box back to Xavier before slipping his hands back into his pockets. "You don't have to take this case Xavier."

"Yes, I do. My Mom gave my Dad protection by giving life to us. And in favor, I have to help find his killer if not for me then at least for my mother and my sister."

* * *

_Twenty-Eight Years Earlier_

**February 7th**

**San Francisco, California**

Derek say quietly in the kitchen, watching Zora make breakfast. He sipped his coffee and wondered for the umpteenth time why he was there. Sure, he loved coming to visit his friends, but it was something about visiting married folks that always threw him into a funk.

And he was in very funky mood these days. A lot had went down since he left Quantico two weeks ago. He had been offered to a position to head up the field office in the Bay and now he was there to check out the surroundings and the inner workings of the office. At first, he had rejected the idea. He liked his job and the people he worked with. There was also the sassy blond he was currently smitten with; in all honestly had too much to lose if left Quantico.

Yet, the Bay offered him stability. He could actually settle down, focus on giving his mother the grandbabies she had asked for. No more nightmares, no more seeing the damage people could do to ine another. He could actually spend time with his God sons and have a normal life. Well, as normal as a FBI agents could be. It all agreed with him, except for one little thing.

If he left Quantico, there would be no Penelope Garcia. If he was honest with himself, he would note that he didn't have her right now either. She had turned down his advancements cold. Unfortunately, he couldn't turn off how he felt about her. He loved her and she, of course, was the perfect woman to be Mrs. Derek Morgan.

He let loose a sigh and focused his attention on his coffee. This was a bad situation, indeed. It was bad enough that he wanted Penelope to be solely his, it wasn't making it any better to see his best friend and wife living it up like the Huxtables.

"Derek?"

"Hmm."

He looked up from his coffee to see Zora standing there hands on her hip, a look of clear frustration on her face. If anyone was to ask him, Zora was the soul-sister version of Penelope. She was quirky, and as nerdy as Penelope, but Zora had an edge about her that presented itself at all times, one that simply screamed: "Beware of the inner queen." She carried herself like royalty, which was the same way he viewed his Goddess. He gave her a quick smile as he sat down his cup.

"Malcolm's calling you."

He lifted his gaze to match hers. "Oh, I didn't hear him.

"Clearly, "she said as she leaned back against the island. "D, do me a favor?"

"Anything for you lovely lady."

She smiled at him, "Call Penelope."

He shook his head, "Anything but that."

Zora sighed as she blew her bangs out of her face. "I never took you for a punk, Derek Morgan."

"Damn, Z, it's like that." He said, giving her his charismatic smile.

"Uh, yeah," she replied as she rolled her eyes and her neck. "And wipe that stupid smile off your face, it's not cute."

Derek pushed his chair away from the table and turned to face her, "Okay, Z. What's really good?"

Zora didn't get a chance to respond as a pair of large arms engulfed her waist. She tilted her head back and allowed her husband to give a sensual good morning kiss.

"Morning, Love."

"Mmmm,"Zora closed her eyes, smiling. "Good morning, Sweetheart."

He nuzzled her neck as he inhaled her scent, "You okay this morning?"

Zora tilted her head up to steal a kiss before responding, "Just peachy."

"You're lying." He whispered in her ear.

She opened her eyes and looked up at him. "Malcolm, talk to Derek."

Malcolm smiled and shook his head as he released her. " He's not going to listen to me."

Zora handed him a cup of coffee, "I don't care. Talk to him."

"You do know, I am sitting right here," Derek finally interjected.

"So what?" Zora replied eyeing him up and down. "How about you go and call Penelope that way you can't hear us talking about you."

"Zora." Derek said his tone warning her to back off.

Zora rounded the island in an instant. "Hold on, homeboy! Don't you 'Zora' me! My own husband doesn't even talk to me like that. You might want to check your bulb, for real."

It was at this time that Malcolm decided to intervene. He knew if left it alone, it would be a possibility his wife would be long gone and missing by noon. It was only 6:30 in the morning.

"Baby, why are you pushing the man to talk to Pen? Obviously, he doesn't want to talk to her."

Zora looked over at her husband who was leaning against the kitchen sink. "His grumpy ass is getting on my nerves. He only gets grumpy when he hasn't had any booty or _his Baby Girl_ is mad at him. And since we all know that he finally tapped Baby Girl, he should be all _Happy, Happy, Joy, Joy _up in this piece. But nooooo, he had to go ruin whatever it was between them and now he's being an ass!"

Derek quickly got out of his chair. "Mal, don't you have a muzzle for her or something?"

"Muzzle?! Boy, let me tell your old, crusty, dusty, I wanna be a playa ass something-"

Zora never got the rest of her words out, because Malcolm clamped his hand over her mouth.

"Will the both of you shut up!" Malcolm's thunderous voice roared through the kitchen. "Why is it that everytime y'all get together, you want to act like a bunch of seven year olds. We are adults and last time I check we're all in our thirties. So what's really good?"

Derek and Zora glared at each other opting to be silent. Malcolm moved his hand from Zora's mouth and turned her to face him.

"Don't get quiet on me now, Baby Love. What's going on?"

Zora met Malcolm's gaze and pouted. "He started it."

"What the hell? You just go lie and say I started it!"

"I'm not lying. You did start it. Derek, you've been walking around here with your ass on your shoulders for the past two days snarling at folks. I don't care if you get all attitudinal with me, but the buck stops with you snapping at my babies. You've snapped at the kids at least three times. And as much as the boys love their "Papa Derek", I will take your FBI trained ass out the game."

"Zora, look-"

She raised her hand cutting him off, "Whatever you're going through must be hard, I get that. And quite frankly, I could care less about an apology right now. I just need you to get on the phone and call Penelope, because it's quiet obvious that she makes you happy."

"Z, why do you keep pushing me to call Penelope. She's said her piece, I said mine. It's over."

"Because I want-" Zora's voiced cracked and she turned away from Derek.

Malcolm sighed and pulled a shaking Zora into his arms. He cradled her, rubbing her back as he shook his head.

"I need you to calm down, Zora. It's too early for you to be getting so excited. Take a deep breath, Mama and let it go."

Zora did as she was instructed,burrowing closer to her husband. Derek watched the two of them slightly miffed. Malcolm lifted her head and wiped the tears from her eyes.

"Go upstairs and lay down." He said as he released her pushing her towards the hallway.

"I can't. I have to make breakfast and get the kids lunches together and-"

"And I think the boys can have their Dad make them breakfast and pack their lunches. I just really need for you to go relax and lay down."

"But Malcolm-"

"There's no negotiating, Zora," Malcolm said, his tone brokering no argument. "I'm not playing with you go lay down.

Zora took her defeat and shuffled towards the door. "Derek, I just want you to have a little bit of the happiness, Malcolm and I have before it's too late. I don't want you to have any regrets."

Derek stared at her and nodded before she turned and went down the hallway. Malcolm watched her as she ascended the stairs. He watched until he couldn't see her anymore. He turned back to Derek who was now standing at the island.

"Malcolm, what the hell is going on?"

Malcolm picked up his coffee cup and walked over to the table. "You know Zora loves you like the brother she never wanted, right?"

Derek laughed as he took his seat, "Yeah, I know."

"Her body's rejecting her heart. She needs to have another surgery."

"How long is the wait?"

"If she takes her meds, doesn't give in to excitement, they think she can hold off on getting a new heart for at least a year maybe two."

"Malcolm."

He looked up at Derek and smiled, "At the rate she's going, I'll give her six months. And she knows that too, which is why she's pushing you to call Pen. She wants to see you off and married, before anything happens to her."

"It's not that easy, Malcolm. You and Zora found each other when life wasn't so damn complicated."

Malcolm sat his cup down on the table. "Derek, you're my brother from another mother, Godfather to my kids, hell you're their only Godparent, I need you to stop making excuses and grab a hold of Penelope."

"Man-"

"Here, me D. You right I lucked out, because I found love, when I wasn't even looking for it. Zora she knew way before I did and when I realized that I was in love with her. It was the best day of my life. I've lucked out because I've spent seventeen years of my life with her. Derek, I don't get the rest of my life with her, because I'm going to outlive her, I know that. She knows that. Hell, even our kids know it. And I'm going to spend the rest of her time on this Earth making her happy. If she died tomorrow, I know that she has given me the greatest joy. She's given me a loving home, beautiful children and a place in her heart that only I can reside. Zora wants you to have that. Because she knows you deserve it."

"My job, makes it hard to have a family. I don't want my wife and my kids to wake up and they get that phone call, that I'm not coming home. I love, Penelope. I just can't do that to her."

"Don't you think that's her decision to make and not yours?"

* * *

**February 21st**

**Quantico, Virginia**

She sat quietly, fingers interlaced as she waited for her test results. She watched as the doctor made a big show of reading her file. She crossed her ankles and stared hoping that the answer she wanted was the one that Dr. Cross was going to present to her. He closed the file and smiled.

"Ms. Garcia."

She looked up from her fingers and stared up at her doctor. "Congratulations, your eleven weeks pregnant."

Penelope just stared at him. Her hand going to her mouth as she placed her hand to her mouth. _I'm _ _pregnant. I, Penelope Garcia have a life growing inside of me. I'm going to be a mom_. As the words played in her mind she was giddy, ecstatic even. Until, she calculated the last time she had sex. Until, she realized who the father of her child was.

She whispered a "Thank You" to the doctor as she made her out of the office. She walked quietly, almost aimlessly, forgetting her car in the doctor's office. Her only thoughts were that she was going to be a mom. And she was having his baby.

She was so preoccupied in her thoughts, that she didn't notice that she was being followed. It was only when she went to turn around and head back to her car that she realized that something was amiss. She had walked four miles, not paying attention to direction just walking along trying to clear head. She glanced up and down the street, luckily for her she knew where she was. As she spotted the bus going back in the direction she was headed. She looked both ways and stepped down into the street.

It was then she heard the gunning of the motor. She looked up and saw the SUV coming straight for her and like a deer frozen in headlights, she couldn't move, all she could do, was tuck her body down and protect her stomach as the runaway SUV hit her head on.

* * *

**June 6th**

**Alexandria, Virginia**

"Zahara?"

Zahara turned and looked up at her mother-in-law. Penelope stepped onto the balcony the smile she had slowly fading as she looked down at the red and puffy eyes of her daughter-in-law.

"Zahara, what's wrong?"

Zahara opened her mouth to speak, but nothing came out. She reached for Penelope's hand.

"It's Zay."

"Did he call?" Penelope's gaze looked over Zahara's stricken face. " What's wrong with my son?"

She shook her head. "Mom, I don't believe in superstition's. I never have. But, something's wrong. " She paused as she blinked back her tears. "I feel like something's going to happen to Zay, but I don't know what it is."

Penelope leaned and gave her a hug, "You're just nervous about having the baby, that's all."

"No. This isn't about the baby, it's about Xavier. When he came to get dressed I was laying out his clothes and I made sure to be meticulous this time, as if I needed to identify him later. I memorized his clothes, black Docker dress slacks, and his favorite dress shirt, the navy blue and white striped french cuffe shirt with the x's on the cuff, his black Cole Haan slippers, a pair of navy blue boxer briefs, and a navy blue a-line t-shirt, and he has on a pair of black socks with navy blue stitching."

Penelope didn't say anything as Zahara turned to her. " I even placed his good watch, on the bed, you know the one he got from Daddy Derek and I gave him the medal you gave me."

Penelope raised an eyebrow, "Why'd you give him the St. Christopher necklace?"

"Because he needs it more than I ever will," Zahara looked up at Penelope. "What does it mean? Am I going crazy? I don't want anything to happen to him."

* * *

_Twenty-Eight Years Earlier_

**February 21st**

**San Francisco, California**

It had been two weeks since Derek had made his decision. He listened to Zora and finally called Penelope. It was the worst decision of his life. The conversation lasted all of five minutes with Penelope doing the majority of the talking. What the conversation boiled down to was this: She loved him, probably always will, but they weren't going to work and they both deserved to be happy with or without each other. Penelope had put the emphasis on the without. When he hung up the phone he decided to take the job in San Francisco and he prayed that this was the right decision.

However, it seemed that everything he was doing in San Francisco, he did it with Penelope in mind. He had bought a house – five bedrooms, with a large back yard, just right for Penelope to have a garden, a pool and barbecue area, and it was within minutes of the beach. Big enough for both of them and any guest or children they may have planned on having. The house was modern, warm and inviting and with a little help from Zora it had the appearance of a home.

Yet, Derek knew that this was not where being his home. His home was wherever Penelope resided and since it was clear she wasn't coming to California, this would just have to be his home away from home.

Derek had another two weeks before he reported to work, but he was taking the time to get used to the weather in California and get used to the people and the lifestyle change. It was different from Chicago and from Virginia, but he knew he could make it out here. He was Derek Morgan, he could make it anywhere.

He had just returned from his evening jog with Clooney when his cell phone rang. He glanced down at the 703 area code and quickly answered the phone as he pushed open the door.

"Morgan."

"Is this Derek Morgan?"

Derek paused as he looked over his shoulder before going into the house. "Yeah."

"My name is Judith Emerson, I'm a nurse at Quantico Naval Hospital, it's about Penelope Garcia."

Derek's heart stopped. His eyes widened as the nurses words slid through his ears. "Okay."

"You're listed as her next-of-kin."

"What happened?"

"I'm not at liberty to say sir, but we need you her to make some critical decisions for Ms. Garcia."

Derek closed his eyes as he looked around his living room. " Do whatever you need to do to keep her alive."

"Mr. Morgan some of the procedures are very risky."

"How long can you wait to do surgery?"

"Hold on, Mr. Morgan."

There was a shuffling sound and a deeper voice was on the line. "Mr. Morgan, I'm Dr. Sampson, I'm taking care of Ms. Garcia's case."

"How long can you keep her out of surgery?"

Dr. Sampson paused, "Two hours minimum- six hours maximum."

Derek sighed, "I'm in California. I should be there within the next six hours. You do whatever you need to do to keep my Baby Girl alive."

* * *

**June 6th**

**Alexandra, Virginia**

"_Hi! You've reached Xavier and Zahara Morgan. Leave us a message and we'll get back to you as soon as possible. Please leave your name, number, and the time that you called and we'll get back to you at our earliest conveince. Until then you take care."_

The machine beeped and Xavier's rich baritone filtered through the room. "Zahara, love when you get-"

Penelope crossed the room and quickly answered the call. "Xavier?"

Silence was Penelope's answer, "Mom."

"Zay, what's wrong?"

"Why are you answering the house phone?"

Penelope paused before answering. "Is there an issue with me answering the phone, Xavier Daniel?"

"Is Zahara all right?"

"Yeah, why wouldn't she be."

"Because you answered the phone out of breath."

And then it dawned on her, Penelope was standing in her son's bedroom. She had never entered his bedroom after his marriage to Zahara and now that she was truthfully standing there it felt awkward. She suddenly understood Xavier's irrational behavior.

"Xavier, everything is fine. Zahara and I were on the porch, talking."

It was a long pause before Xavier spoke. " Can you put Zahara on the phone?"

"Sure," Penelope said as she crossed the room to hand Zahara the phone.

Zahare looked up at Penelope as she stuck out her hand. She pulled herself up from her seat and took the phone from her.

"Zahara Morgan."

"You know I think that is the sexiest thing you've ever said to me."

Zahara looked up at Penelope and felt the flush in her cheeks, "I've thought I've said sexier things than that."

He paused. "Possibly, but today, right now, it's the sexiest thing I've heard."

She laughed, "What can I do for you, lover boy."

He was silent and Zahara could see the wheels in Xavier's mind working. "Xavier, what's wrong?"

"Zahara, know that I love you. If you don't know anything else, know that I love you."

Zahara looked up at Penelope with questioning eyes. " You're leaving tonight aren't you."

Xavier sighed, "Yeah, we're going to Chicago. They've found a witness for my Dad's case."

Zahara closed her eyes and sighed. "Xavier, I want you to promise me one thing."

"What's that Love?"

"You be safe and make it back as soon as you can."

* * *

_Twenty- Eight Years Earlier_

**February 21st**

**San Francisco, California**

"Cain Enterprises, this is Madeline Chenault, how can I help you today?"

"Madeline, this is Derek Morgan I need you to connect me to Malcolm Cain, tell him it's an emergency."

"Please hold."

Derek cradled the phone to his ear as he shut his front door. Normally, he wouldn't have made the call, he'd have figured out a way to get to Penelope on his own. However, when you have friends in very high places you used them and so Derek was calling in all the favors he could and as far as he was concerned Malcolm Jonathan Cain, owed him big.

"Derek, what's going on man?"

"I need to borrow the jet."

Malcolm chuckled softly. "Dude, you just don't borrow a jet, what's going on?"

"Penelope's been in accident. It's touch and go."

There was a pause on the other end. "How long until you're ready?"

"I'm walking to the car now."

"Let me make some calls, I'll have you out within the hour."

By the time Derek made it to the airstrip, the G-5, was gassed up and loaded with Malcolm, Zora and their children Jamison, Malcolm Jr. and Marcus. If Derek was shocked he didn't say a word he just took his seat and awaited take off.

Derek didn't know how Malcolm had managed it, but he landed in Quantico four hours later and was quickly carted off to the Quantico Naval Hospital. Upon his arrival, he met Dr. Reid who had been pacing in front of the hospital.

" How is she?"

Spencer looked up to see a panic stricken Derek Morgan and smiled, "They won't tell us anything they are waiting for you."

Without another word, Derek rushed in and straight to the desk. They directed him up to ICU. Penelope for the moment was stable. He stood in the hall and waited for Dr. Sampson to appear and when he did it was clear from the look on his face, all hell was about to break loose.

"Dr. Sampson?" Derek questioned as he looked the older man up and down.

"You must be Mr. Morgan," He replied his voice softer then it should've been.

"Yes. "

"Mr. Morgan, Ms. Garcia was rundown by a car."

Derek stilled his emotions as he listened carefully to the doctor.

"We tried to hold off as long as we could on the surgery, but we couldn't, she had internal bleeding and her heart stopped. We had to go in and correct the problem. Her ribs were broken and one rib punctured her lung. We were able to stop the bleeding and repair her lungs."

Derek simply nodded his head as he waited for Dr. Sampson to continue.

"Ms. Garcia is healthy, so if she rests like she's supposed to, she should have a healthy and speedy recovery."

Derek stared at the doctor for a moment taking him in. He folded his arms and leaned against the wall and sighed.

"There's one other thing Mr. Morgan."

Derek looked up at the doctor, his eyebrows raised.

"Unfortunately, we couldn't save the fetus, I'm sorry."

Derek stood there staring at the doctor, his fingers rubbing together slightly, "Fetus?"

Dr. Sampson closed his eyes and took a deep breath, "Ms. Garcia was heading towards the end of her first trimester of her pregnancy. Once, again I'm very sorry."

It was then that Derek felt the pain in his heart. He knew he wasn't having a heart attack. In fact, he knew that this must've been the way that his mom felt when she had lost his father. It was a painful, burning sensation, one that would only heal time. She had been pregnant, with his child. She was going to have their baby. He was supposed to have been a father and she was supposed to have been a mother.

If this had been another time or perhaps another life, what happened next would've been funny, but then again we are talking about Derek Morgan. In the matter of seconds he went from to being the stoic strong man that he was, to sliding to the floor bawling like a baby.


	4. Chapter 4: You Are Not Alone

**A/N: I know it's been awhile since I've been here. I was still working behind the scenes all. So here is the next installment of Back At One.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Criminal Minds or any companies affiliated with the program.**

* * *

**Chapter 4: You Are Not Alone**

**_Twenty-Eight Years Earlier_**

**February 21st**

**Quantico, Virginia**

Zora Cain watched as Derek broke down and cried. She rushed to him dropping to her knees and wrapping her arms around him. In the twenty years she had known Derek, she had never seen him cry. She'd seen him shot, stabbed, and with broken bones, but she had never seen him like this. This was the weird part, the part that seemed to be so unreal to her. And yet as Derek turned to look at her, she knew that something inside of him was broken.

"Derek, is Penelope okay?" She asked as she rubbed his bald head.

Derek nodded before reaching for her hand. "Why are you rubbing my head?"

"It used to calm you when we were kids, back when you actually had this thing called hair."

He cracked a small smile and Zora kissed his forehead. "What's going on Derek?"

"She lost the baby, Z. I didn't even know she was pregnant."

Zora body's shot up as she looked at Derek. "Pregnant?"

"It was the end of her first trimester."

There was a long pause, "Derek, I don't think I'm prepared to have this conversation."

Derek just stared at her then, really stared at her. Her more than vibrant personality, suddenly had a lackluster appeal. She gave him a half-smile as she gave his hand a squeeze.

"I'm going to get Malcolm."

She moved to stand when Derek held on to her hands. "Zora?"

She rolled her eyes as she stared at him, "God, I hate profilers," she said with a smile. "Derek,we grieve in our own right and we move on at our own pace. I still haven't came to terms with it, not like Malcolm."

"How am I going to tell, Pen?"

Zora sighed as she leaned up against the wall, "Maybe you shouldn't be the one to tell her."

"And why not?"

"Because there was a reason why you didn't know she was pregnant in the first place, she needs to tell you."

"What if she never tells me?"

Zora looked down at the ground and then back up at him, "I really can't have this conversation with you."

He saw it in her eyes then, the hurt, the sadness and the embarrassment. He saw her fear and frustration and he turned her loose. She stood then and carried herself down the hall, running directly into Malcolm who was stepping off the elevator, with the boys.

"Hey, Mama, where you're going?" Malcolm asked as he slid an arm around her waist.

Zora looked up at Malcolm and saw the concern in his eyes. She smiled at him, before looking down at her boys.

"Um, I think the boys should go and check in. I'm just out of it."

"What's wrong?"

"Actually, it's Derek. I can't be here. I can't help him through this."

Malcolm's eyebrows raised, "What happened? Did you get into it with Derek, again? Baby, you promised that you wouldn't fight with him if you came along."

Zora rolled her eyes. It would take her husband to remind her that she promised not to fight with his best friend.

"We're not fighting, Malcolm. I just can't help him through this."

"Zora, all you have to do is be here."

"And I _can't_ be here Malcolm. I can't do this with Derek."

Malcolm looked from Zora to Derek and simply nodded his head. "Let me at least call Rhyse and have him take you."

" I am perfectly capable of driving, thank you," Zora replied.

Malcolm looked at her again before diverting his gaze downward. At five months, Zora was barely showing, and yet his wife had that full pregnancy glow. He sighed as he acquiesced and kissed her forehead. He handed her his car keys and without a word she gathered her children and stepped back on the elevator. Malcolm watched as the elevator doors closed before turning back to Derek.

_**June 6th**_

_**Alexandria, Virginia**_

Zahara and Penelope descended the stairs giggling about Xavier when Zahara stopped in her tracks. She gripped the edge of the banister and took a deep whiff, scanning the hallway before her.

Penelope stopped at the bottom of the stairs and looked up at her.

"Zahara, what's wrong?"

"It smells like white chocolate and macadamia nut cookies."

Penelope raised an eyebrow, "Okay?"

"There my favorite," Zahara said as she bounced down the stairs, "My mom used to make them for me."

She reached the bottom of the stairs and turned her head towards the kitchen. A small smiled slid across her face as she slid into the kitchen, with Penelope on her heels.

"I swear you bet not be eating my cookies!" Zahara snapped as she popped her brother in the head.

"Hey, Li'l Girl,"He replied as he wrapped his arm around her waist, "You're not going to share your cookies."

"Nope, Mama and Baby Morgan have been craving for these cookies all week," Zahara said as she picked the plate up off the table.

"Then it's a good thing, that husband of yours called and asked for the recipe."

Zahara's back stiffened as she turned slowly towards the voice. She placed the cookies down before she ran and leapt in his arms.

"Daddy!"

He laughed as he spun his daughter around. "Hey, there now, little lady, lets calm down, that's my granddaughter in there."

She giggled as she pressed a kiss to her father's cheek. " The baby could be a boy. Daddy, what are you and the boys doing here?"

"My only daughter is having her first child, I hope you didn't think I was going to miss that."

Zahara smiled as she rested her head against her father's chest, "I didn't think you were going to miss it, but we're not due for another few weeks."

He looked down at his little girl before turning his gaze to Penelope who was watching him, "While that may be true, Morgan babies have a tendency to show up whenever they're ready, right P."

She smiled as she slipped a cookie from the plate and chewed thoughtfully. " That's very true. But when they show up, you understand why God makes the sunshine and why love keeps the world spinning."

Zahara broke away from her father and moved to give Penelope a hug. "Mom, it's a great day. You gave my greatest gift, today. You know that?"

" I did, huh." Penelope said with a laugh.

"Yep, you sure did, And I'm pretty sure Daddy Derek is a proud man," Zahara looked over her shoulder's at her father. "Right, Daddy?"

Malcolm Cain's midnight colored eyes shone with love as he stared at his daughter, "Absolutely."

"See, I got back up Mom and you know my Daddy knows all."

Penelope's gaze went from Zahara to Malcolm who was still standing behind Zahara. She didn't dispute Zahara, simply because she knew the truth. Malcolm Cain did indeed know all. However, Penelope's heart was not eased, the last time she had saw Malcolm was at Zahara and Xavier's wedding and his words still haunted her.

* * *

_"Penelope Morgan." He whispered in her ear._

_ Penelope flinched as she felt his hand sit in the center of her back. She didn't bother to lift her gaze, she knew exactly who it was from the seduction behind the voice. He guided her away from the bar and across his elegant backyard to the wooden porch wing that sat on his patio. He offered her a seat as he stood out looking at the horizon._

_ "The first time I met you, I knew that you were going to bring Derek joy," He said softly his voice smooth as velvet. "Of course, it had to have been the worst day of his life, but I saw something in you that Zora must have saw in me."_

_ "And what was that, Malcolm?"_

_ "Love. Zora was good at seeing the love in people. Hell, she made my cold-hearted ass love her with every fiber of my being and that was a feat within itself. And she showed me that love if not cared for properly, has the propensity to destroy the magic."_

_ Penelope finally looked at Malcolm. He had turned away from the setting sun and focused his being on her._

_ "What aren't you telling me, Malcolm?"_

_ "The magic is wearing off, Penelope and you will see the cracks in the veneer."_

_ "I don't speak riddles, Malcolm."_

_ He paused and closed his eyes. "Everything that you thought was perfect, it's going to end up being nothing but a lie. And when it falls down Penelope, those that we love deeply will be hurt and they will perish because of love."_

_ Penelope stood and moved towards him, "We? Malcolm there is no 'we'?"_

_ "Xavier and Zahara made us an official 'we' today. But when Derek asked me to be the godfather of your children, I became bound to your family, just like he was bound to mine."_

_ Malcolm looked her directly in the eye and what Penelope saw startled her, his eyes had changed to a ghastly silver. "I will do my best to protect them, if I have to move heaven and earth I will, but there are just some things, Penelope, some things that I just can't control."_

_ "Malcolm?"_

_ "Fate has brought Xavier and Zahara together, but faith has to bind them."_

_ Fate has brought Xavier and Zahara together, but faith has to bind them._ Penelope stopped her own musings to find Malcolm staring at her. A sad smile creased his lips, the worry lines that had creased his face were starting to show. His eyes changed from black to silver and Penelope felt the tears form. She understood why Malcolm was there; and the pain in her heart allowed the tears to fall.

_**Twenty-Eight Years Earlier**_

_**February 22nd**_

_**Quantico, Virginia**_

It had been roughly eighteen hours since Derek arrived and Penelope went from bad to worse. Somehow during the night she had slipped into a coma, leaving Derek once again to feel helpless. So he sat quietly, holding vigil, his fingers interlocked with hers as he watched and waited for her to open her eyes, just so he could apologize and say all the things that he could not say.

From the door way Zora stood watching as Derek lifted Penelope's hands to his lips. In the years she had known Derek, she had secretly referred to him as her "Pookie Bear". True enough, Derek didn't have the appearance of a pookie bear, in fact he was quite the opposite, but it was the warmth and comfort that she saw in him and that he routinely gave her, that brought about the nickname. And as she watched him she knew that he was hurting inside.

She moved from the doorway coffee cup in hand as she reached out and tapped his shoulder. He looked up at her and smiled.

"Hey," he said softly.

"Hey," she replied as her gaze shifted to Penelope. "You really do love her, huh?"

Derek shifted his gaze from Zora back to Penelope. "She's my world."

"Never thought I'd see the day, where'd you openly admit that."

"Never thought I'd see the day, when I'd have to."

Zora shook her head as she handed him the cup. "Listen, why don't you go and take a ride with Malcolm."

Derek shook his head, "Naw, I'm okay."

"Let me say it again. Derek, Malcolm is waiting for you."

He looked up at her then and saw the frustration in her eyes. He sat back in the chair and sighed. "Z, I fucked up big time."

"Listen, Derek you didn't mess up it just wasn't the right time."

"Zora, I made her choose."

Zora rolled her eyes, "Derek, just because she didn't say what you wanted her to say doesn't mean that she doesn't feel the same way you do. And you being here, show's exactly how much love her."

"What if it's too late?"

She cut her eyes at him and thumped him on his forehead, "Have I not taught you anything! When it comes to love, Derek, I mean true serious love, nothing is going to stand in the way of that."

Derek still didn't say a word. Zora shook her head and smiled. "Go and talk with Malcolm. It gives you an opportunity to stretch your legs, take a shower and buy her some roses."

* * *

"Is he okay?"

Malcolm turned to see Spencer Reid, Jennifer Jareau, Aaron Hotchner, Emily Prentiss and David Rossi staring into Penelope's room. Derek was sitting there watching Penelope and Zora was standing behind him, her hand rested on his shoulder.

Malcolm cleared his throat, "Derek's fine."

All eyes turned to Malcolm. The gazes ranged from confusion to impressive. Malcolm was used to it. At 6'4" and 265 pounds, Malcolm was massive. His voice was deep and rolling like thunder and yet it was his handsomely chiseled face that often threw people. Malcolm was most definitely model handsome and yet his demeanor often gave the impression that there was nothing modelesque about him.

Emily was the first one to get over her amazement and cleared her throat, "Who are you exactly?"

Malcolm's gaze focused on her and stared at her quite openly, trying to size her up to see if she was friend or foe. Emily's gaze matched his and Malcolm gave her a slow sinister smile. His smile grew and her gaze slowly moved from him to Aaron. His gaze moved with Emily's, his eyes lingering on Hotch's before he looked back to Emily.

"Malclom Cain."

Emily stared at him blankly. He knew that the name meant nothing her, his name meant nothing to most people. However, it was J.J who stepped forward, her eyes glittering with shock.

"Aren't you C.E.O of Cain Enterprises?"

Malcolm simply nodded his head.

"Oh wow."

Spencer looked up at Malcolm his interest peeked, "Cain Enterprises. You were the company hired to help repair the Space Shuttle _Atlantis._"

Again Malcolm simply nodded, "You must be Dr. Reid."

Before Spencer could answer Emily chimed in, "That still doesn't explain who you are?"

Malcolm stared at her again, his head cocked to the side. "And you must be Emily Prentiss."

Before anyone could respond Zora stepped into the hallway. "Malcolm, it's time."

Malcolm nodded his head before turning away, "Excuse me."

Zora stood there and looked after her husband before turning back to the group. "What's going on?"

"Who are you?" Emily asked her tone dry and angry.

"I am Legend." Zora replied.

A look of confusion ran ramped across everyone's face except for Hotch and Rossi.

"Zora Legend, I thought you retired?" David asked as he stepped forward to give her hug.  
Zora laughed as she hugged him, "I'm no longer in the field. Those days are long and gone. And it's Cain, now."

"So, you finally decided to claim him?" Hotch asked with a quirky smile.

Zora shook her head and turned towards him. "I always claimed him, I just didn't use his name."

Hotch extended his hand, "I see. What are you doing here?"

Zora didn't hesitate to respond, "Derek, called and said that Penelope was here, there was no question."

Emily looked her over, "You're the reason that Morgan left?"

"No, Agent Prentiss, an opportunity presented itself and Agent Morgan was smart enough to take it." Zora replied matter-of-factually.

"Whoa, there is no need to get defensive." Rossi interjected.

Zora cast a side long look at Emily before looking at Rossi. "Tell me something; at this moment in time are you all still on a last name basis, or is it okay to call each other by the first name."

"Zora," David Rossi said warningly.

"I'm not Erin Strauss, David Rossi. And so I'm going to tell you like I told Derek. My own husband doesn't talk to me like that and that should tell you something."

Before anyone could say another word, her phone rang. Zora glanced down at the caller I.D. and shook her head before turning to walk away.

"If you'll excuse me." She called over her shoulder. "Erin, were your ears burning I was just talking about you."

"Who in the hell is she?" Emily Prentiss asked.

"That's Zora Legend." Rossi replied.

Emily sighed, "I got that much Rossi. Who is she?"

Aaron Hotchner looked at Emily for a second. "She's a B.A.U onto herself."

"Excuse me?" Emily said.

"You heard me, she started out as a Tech Analyst for a B.A.U when she graduated from Northwestern. Two years later she was a profiler. She was a two-for-one deal."

"And what does she do now?" Reid asked as he looked down the hall at the woman on the phone.

"Besides running the West Coast Field Operations, she is a recommender."

It was a moment of silence before anyone responded

"Recommender?" All eyes turned to Rossi.

"Yes, a recommender. I recommend were people are placed in the FBI, specifically I recommend whose placed in my jurisdiction and who's not, and I also recommend whether or not Agents should be placed in certain units." Zora replied as she stared Emily down.

"Are you trying to imply something?" Emily replied.

"Oh, no, I don't imply. I dictate. So direct from me to you; I'm not the one you'd want to piss off. With the right buzzwords in the right ear I'd have this team dismantled in a heartbeat and have you on your way to Vanatu."

"Are you threatening me?" Emily asked her eyebrow went up.

Zora smiled. "You work in an arena that is full of alpha men and sometime you want to exert your testosterone. What I am telling you, Emily Prentiss, is this, not even your mother's connections could save your job if I deem that you lose it. And for the record, I have the biggest set of cahunas on the playground. Okay, cupcake."

"Are you dismantling my team, Zora?"

"You went up for review. And we both got what we wanted, Hotch. That's all that mattered." Zora said as she stared across the hall at Derek and Malcolm. "I didn't come out here to talk shop, I came out here to give Malcolm and Derek space."

"What's going on?" Hotch asked.

" I had to intervene, before they split your team, before Derek did something stupid."

"I don't understand."

" He loves her. The BAU be damned."

* * *

"I remember the first time that I ever feared losing Zora, was when I woke up and she was lying next to me crying." Malcolm said quietly.

Derek lifted his gaze and didn't say a word, he just grunted.

"I had spent the first five years of my marriage, lying to the woman who I had devoted my life to, trying to protect and honor my country. I missed birthday's, anniversaries, pregnancies, because I had instructions that I had to carry out. I missed out on five years with my wife."

"It's not the same, Malcolm. You were a CIA operative before you married Zora."

"I was a CIA Operative, who didn't disclose my job to my wife. My job cost the life of what would've been my first –born child. A girl, her name was Morgan."

"Morgan?" Derek asked.

"Morgan Laurel Cain, born December 25, 2000, 8 pds, 14 oz, 22 inches long. Delivered with a fractured skull and a broken neck; she was stillborn." Malcolm said as he crossed his arms. "I watched the video of them beating her, they didn't get around to raping her though, because by that time she was already bleeding. She laid in her own blood and feces for two days before anybody fund her and she still had to deliver our baby, alone."

Derek stared at him for a moment, "How can you be so cavalier about that?"

Malcolm gave him a ghost of a smile. "You know she wouldn't even look at me when I woke up. She laid their listening to my heartbeat and all she said to me was, 'After all we've been through, you still lied to me. I lost our baby because of your lies. And now you've lost me.' She had gotten a promotion and left Virginia and I was just a shell of a man."

Malcolm stepped closer, "You say that I'm cavalier about losing my daughter and damn near losing my wife and I guarantee you it's not that way. I spent two years of my life atoning for my sins, beginning her forgiveness only to find out that she had moved on, that she had somebody else and she was going to have a baby. There was no way in hell, I was going to let another person come in and take my wife. I did the only sensible thing. I retired from the CIA and begged my wife to take me back."

"How many times die you have to beg?"

Malcolm shook his head. "Every day for six months. Well, that was after I had kidnapped her. It was a drastic situation and I had to figure out what to do, so yes I held her captive for ten days. Ten days that I promised to never leave and that she allowed me to make love to her. Ten days that I was still her husband, ten days in which I reminded her why she loved me."

"And on the eleventh day?"

"I opened the door and told her that if she wanted me she just had to say the words and if not the keys were in the car and there was a plane ticket at the Delta's airline counter waiting just for her. She left me and went back to Jordin."

Derek's eyes widened, "Jordin ? Jordin Mallory?"

Malcolm simply nodded. "I couldn't get mad, she and Jordin had a relationship. And she was allowed to have that, and I was okay with that because she couldn't marry her. However, Jordin wanted her to herself and I couldn't blame her for that. I mean Zora is fucking fantastic. She cooks, cleans and the way that she loves is indescribable. Only problem was Zora was carryng my son and there was no way in hell, I was going to walk away now."

"Mal, I know all about you and Zora getting back together, what is the purpose of this story?"  
Malcolm smiled, "When she wakes up, treat her as if she's alive. Treat her as if you want her. Treat her as if she means the world to you, because she means the world to you. As if she's the only one you'll need. The both of you lost something that is special, but you remind her that she is not alone and that you'll get through this together."

"What if she doesn't want to get through this together?"

"It doesn't matter, Derek. You both lost your baby."

Malcolm turned to walk away, "I'll leave you alone now."

"Hey, Mal?"

Malcolm looked back over his shoulder, "Yeah?"

"Thanks, man."

Malcolm nodded his head before continuing out the door. As Malcolm entered the hallway there was something that just didn't settle in his spirit right. He scanned the whole looking for Zora when his eyes landed on J.J and Spencer.

Malcolm's gaze was centered on J.J's face, he cocked his head to the side and watched as her gaze finally met his. He knew that his staring was making her uncomfortable, but he couldn't help it. It was something about them, something about her that just wasn't right.

"You're J.J, right?" Malcolm asked as he sat down next to her.

J.J. closed her eyes before responding. "Yes."

"And you're Penelope's bestfriend, right?"

J.J. eyes opened and she looked at Malcolm, "Yes."

"And she has a boyfriend, right?"

It was clear that J.J. wasn't in the mood for questions." Yes."

"And you called him?"

This time it was Spencer that answered, " Yes, we called. What's with all the questions?"

Malcolm just shook his head, "I just doesn't make sense to me. If my wife had been hit by a car, I'd have been here. Nothing would've kept me from her. Hell, Derek-"

And then he paused. He turned his attention from J.J. to Penelope's room and for an instant, Malcolm's features darkened and his eyes became menacing. He moved from his chair and moved towards Penelope's room; when Zora intercepted him.

"Baby, what are you doing?" Zora asked as she placed her hand on his chest.

"I was just going to talk to Derek."

Zora tilted her head back, "You're not about to get Derek all wound up and go and kill that boy."

"I stopped killing years ago, I just maim people."

"You need facts."

"His girlfriend has been mowed down by an SUV yesterday and we haven't seen him. That doesn't make sense. To me that's an admission of guilt."

"And that's not going to hold up in a court of law, Malcolm. You know that!"

Malcolm eyed his wife and rolled his eyes. "What do you want me to do?"

"You let me take care of Kevin Lynch, Malcolm."

"Her boyfriend's name is Kevin Lynch? What kind of-"

"It's the name his mama gave him, Malcolm," Zora replied with a chuckle. "Promise me you won't do anything stupid."

Malcolm stared at her for a long time and sighed. "I promise."

Zora smiled at him before cradling his face in her her hands, "You told him about Morgan, didn't you?"

"How'd you know?"

"The haunted look in your eyes," Zora replied. "Everything is going to be okay, Mal. You know that right?"

"Yeah, I know."

"Good. I'm going to go and pick up the children from Rhyse."

* * *

Malcolm scrolled through his contact list and found the number he was looking for. He clicked the talk button and moved slowly towards the elevators. He leaned against the wall and waited.

"Malcolm J. Cain, what do I owe this surprise?"

Malcolm paused as he turned around to find his eyes on J.J's and he smiled, "Rhyse, it's time to pay the piper."

Rhyse cleared her throat before he responded. "What's going on?"

"I need you to find someone for me. Name's Kevin Lynch."

" What do you need him for? Kevin Lynch, is a computer tech over in Quantico. Never had a parking ticket, I do believe the man's never jay-walked. He's not in your line of business, Mal."

"I want to know everything about him, Rhyse. _Everything_."

"What did he do, Malcolm?"

Malcolm sighed as he looked up at the wall, "It's what he didn't do, that concerns me. Find him Rhyse, and call me back."

* * *

The door to Penelope Garcia rooms swung open with so much force that it bounced off the wall. Derek emerged from the room his body pulsating and radiating anger. His gaze landed on his ex-team. He stared at them for a moment before he announced the news.

"Penelope's awake," Derek said

"Derek, what's wrong?" J.J. asked as she stepped into his path.  
Derek stared at J.J. before looking past her towards the bank of elevators, "Penelope's awake and I gotta go."

"Derek?"

His gaze made it back to J.J and had grown cold, "She's asking for Kevin."


	5. Chapter 5: The Only One For Me

**Chapter 5: The Only One For Me**

_Twenty-Eight Years Earlier_

_April _14th

_San Francisco, California_

"Agent Morgan, you have a visitor."

Derek leaned back in his chair and nodded at the young man who was standing in the doorway. He dropped the pen that was in his hand in the file and stood; closing the file as he awaited his visitor.

"Just because I happen to know your boss, doesn't mean that you have to follow protocol all the time."

He didn't even crack a smile, he just stared at her, annoyance flashing across his face. "What, do I owe this pleasure, _Agent_ Cain?"

"Wow," she said as she closed the door behind her. "I'm Agent Cain now. I take it you're still mad at me."

He rolled his eyes as he rounded the desk, "I'm not mad at you, Zora."

"Then what's the problem? You haven't returned any of my phone calls and you haven't been over for dinner in weeks. I know that keeping company with a married woman is immoral, but the least you could do is spend time with your best friend and godsons."

Derek leaned against the edge of his desk and sighed. " Did you come all the way down here to make me feel bad?"

"No, I came down here to make sure, I don't have to fly out to Virginia and stomp a mudhole in Penelope Garcia's ass, for messing with my Pookie."

Derek cracked a small smile. "Pookie? I thought we left that nick name behind."

Zora laughed. "You'll always be my Pookie Bear, Derek. Things haven't changed that much."

"In all actuality a lot has changed, Agent Cain."

Zora didn't respond, she just watched as the sadness played across his face. She had known Derek for over twenty years and she had never seen him like this. She knew Derek enough that he hid what bothered him behind his cool, calm and collected façade, but Zora had the uncanny ability to see through all that. She was one of the few people who was allowed the chance to see the true Derek Morgan. And so she had learned things about him that not even his mother knew. However, being in his inner circle, brought a price and Zora realized that she was about to start paying for it in spades.

"Listen, I'm going to Alexandria, in a few hours. Is there anything you need me to do?"

He paused for a second, "Can you check over my rental properties?"

"Sure I can."

Derek eyed her for a moment, " You know what, I have an easier, non-life threatening thing for you to do."

"What's that?"

"Could you clean out my desk and my office?"

"Before I give you my answer, I have one question."

Derek nodded his head, "Shoot."

"Why can't you do it?"

Derek stared at her for a long moment, "I have no intention of going back to Quantico."

Zora returned his gaze before nodding. "Sure, I'll do it. Well, I have paperwork to finish before I fly out."

She turned then and headed towards the door. Derek watched her as she reached for the knob.

"Hey, Z?"

Zora glanced back over her shoulder, "Yeah, Pookie?"

He smirked, "Why'd you _really_ come all the way over here?"

Zora pushed the door closed and stared at him for a long moment. "What did she do to you Derek?"

Derek stilled before answering, "That topic is off limits."

Zora shook her head, "Whatever happened in that hospital room, changed everything in you. And it's not fair and it ain't right."

"Life isn't fair, Zora."

Zora cocked her eyebrow and placed a hand on her hip. She gazed at Derek before walked up on him.

"Don't do me, Derek. Don't feed me that bullshit. I may no longer be a behavorial analyst, but I do know everything about you. And I know that when you walked out of that room, you were broken."

Derek rose to his full height and lifted Zora so they were eye to eye, "Zora, I'mma tell you this one time, you don't know shit about me."

She just stared at him and the saw hurt and pain that radiated through him. He sat her back down before pushing her away and going back behind the desk.

Zora glanced at Derek before straightening her attire, " Derek, the big bad wolf act didn't scare me when I was 16 and it damn sure ain't scaring me now, but I tell you what, you don't have to tell me. I'll get it straight from the horse's mouth, myself."

"Stay away from Penelope, Zora."

"I can't. As I recall, you sent me to Quantico, to clean out your desk remember."

Derek just glared at her. "You don't have to talk to her to clean."

Zora shook her head and laughed. "Okay."

"Zora, I will have you written-up for insubordination."

Zora folded her arms. "Agent Morgan, you may run the San Francisco field office, but I am in charge of West Coast field operations. You can't write me up, darling. Remember, I'm your boss and I do the write-ups. Now, if you excuse me, I have paperwork to finish before I leave."

Derek said nothing as she walked out of his office, slamming the door behind her. He sank down in his chair and sighed. He had made a grave error. He should've never asked Zora to pick up his things; that was a horrible idea. However, his error was in how much he had revealed to Zora. He had said too much and he knew that she was going to do some serious damage when she got to Quantico.

Honestly, he couldn't blame her, because if he had been a violent man, he would've killed Penelope Garcia himself. He had thought about that fateful day three months ago, thought about the heartache and pain that he felt and realized that maybe Penelope should experience the wrath of Zora. He picked up his phone and placed a courtesy call to Hotch, simply to inform him of the storm that was coming his way.

* * *

_She was in pain. The sound of the heart monitor brought her to full awareness. Her eyes fluttered open and all she could see was darkness. Her mouth was dry like cotton, her head was throbbing as if a thousand jackhammers were pounding against her skull. She squinted trying to remember what had happened when the faint smell of Cool Water hit her._

_ She stopped thinking as she took another breath, this time tasting the tantalizing fragrance that reminded her of Derek. She smiled softly as she remembered nuzzling close to his neck, inhaling that scent that soothed her, that warmed her, that made her feel so alive. She drifted back to sleep with pleasant thoughts of him and her and their baby._

_ When she regained consciousness, hours later, her eyes opened to the bright light shining through the window. She turned her head to see Derek sitting in the chair sleeping. She smiled and shifted in the bed only to be hit by excruciating pain. She let loose a low painful moan that brought Derek to full attention._

_ "Baby girl."_

_ She moaned again, closing her eyes to the jackhammering that returned to her head. She felt God awful, as if she had been hit by a car. And then it all came rushing back to her, the doctor's office, the baby, the car hitting her full force. She stilled for a moment, and then she freaked._

_ "What are you doing here?" She managed to get out as Derek eased himself on the side of the bed._

_ "You were hit by a car." He said softly, as he stroked her cheek, "You gave us all a scare."_

_ She opened her eyes and met his warm and attentive gaze. " I know what happened. I asked what are _you_ doing here."_

_ He stopped what he was doing and lifted his hand. "You were hit by a car," he reiterated, his voice having a biting edge to it._

_ Penelope closed her eyes trying to make sense of it all. "Where's Kevin?"_

_ "Kev-" Derek stopped mid-sentence and stared at her._

_ "He's supposed to be here, not you." She mumbled softly._

_ Derek gazed at her and waited for her to open her eyes and when she did, he knew that she truthfully meant what she said. And then it sunk in, truly sunk in, that whatever he and Penelope had was done. _

_ He didn't say another word, he just stood and walked out of her room, out of the hospital and out of her life._

_

* * *

_

_April 15th_

_Quantico, Virginia_

There are moments in life in which you wish you could take back the things that you said. Erase the pain that you cause yourselves and the ones you love. The past two months of her life, as far as Penelope was concerned, was full of those moments and as she stepped off the elevator back to her first day of work, she was glad that it was over. However, there were some things that she couldn't shake. Some things that she couldn't change; like the words she said to Derek or the fact that she hadn't seen him since she entered the hospital. She'd admit that her words were rude, but she didn't expect him not to come around.

Her steps slowed as she entered the bullpen to see a young black woman standing next to Hotch. She watched as she smiled at Hotch chuckling softly before turning and heading towards Derek's office. Penelope continued watching her as she stopped at Emily's desk.

"What's going on and where's Derek?"

Emily turned her head and looked up at Penelope and smiled. "What makes you think that something 's going on?"

Penelope eyed Emily before responding, "I haven't seen him nor talked to him in months. Is he undercover or something?"

Emily stood, mouth agape, "You don't know?"

"I don't know what?" Penelope asked. She paused as her gaze scanned the bullpen, "What happened to Derek?"

Before Emily could say anything Hotch stepped out of his office, "Garcia, I need to see you in my office."

Penelope didn't say a word she just continued on to Hotch's office, with her mind solely on Derek.

* * *

Zora opened the bottom drawer to find Derek's fun drawer she smiled as she rifled through the drawer, empting its contents as she gently packed them away. Zora had become keenly aware of how much Penelope Garcia meant to Derek as she rifled through his drawers it was very clear he loved her. Very clear that she meant more to him than half of the females he had dated; it was very clear that he wanted more from her than anybody else. And that in itself bothered Zora.

She sat back in her chair and looked at the picture of Derek and Penelope that was sitting on the desk. It was weird; to her they looked wonderful together. There was something about their chemistry that leaped off the picture and it pissed her off to no end that Penelope wasn't going to make this work. Zora had never seen Derek want someone as bad as he wanted Penelope Garcia, and if she had her way. Which, she knew was going to happen, Penelope and Derek would be getting together very soon.

She turned away from the picture and continued to pack up Derek's things. He may not have wanted to come back to Quantico, but she knew if directed it would be there. She would be his saving grace this time, but the next time, she would let Derek handle this all on his own.

* * *

"How are you feeling?" Hotch asked as he shut the door behind them.

Penelope gave him a soft smile, "I'm fine. I'm glad to be back."

"Have a seat," Hotch motioned towards the chair watching Penelope sit down before he took his seat. "Penelope, I called you in here to let you know that while we're glad you're back, there has been a series of changes that have taken place."

Penelope looked at shock with a small bit of shock. "Changes?"

Hotch simply nodded his head, "Yes, as you may already know, Derek is no longer with us."

"No longer with us?"

Hotch smiled, "Derek was offered a position to head up the San Francisco office ,right before your accident. "

Penelope eyes misted, "Oh, well, I'm sure that whoever they sent to replace him, will be fine."

Hotch nodded again,"Speaking of replacements, Kevin has been working diligently to keep up with our inquiries. He's just not as gifted as you."

"Well, not everyone can be the goddess of all knowing."

Hotch smiled, "That is true, Garcia."

"Is there anything else, sir?"

"No. If you need anything just let me know."

"Thank you, sir." Penelope slid out of the seat and sashayed to the door.

"Garcia?"

Penelope stopped and looked back over her shoulder, "Yes sir."

"Welcome back, Penelope."

Penelope smiled, "Thank you, sir."

* * *

Zora placed the last piece of tape on the box before pulling out the laptop she had borrowed from the tech pool. She reached into her briefcase and found the disk she was looking for. She stared at the gold encrypted disk and smiled. A part of her knew she was wrong for what she was about to do, but the other part of her, knew it was for the best. She uploaded the files from the disk, added a couple of missing details and signed off on it. She had did some other work and logged off, remembering to take the disk with her. She quickly gathered her personal effects and stepped out into the hallway eager to return the lap top.

* * *

Spencer Reid stared at the e-mail that had just appeared in his inbox. It was an urgent message sent from the Director of the Bureau. Spencer opened the e-mail at the same time that 230 other agents did, and then the unthinkable happened. Spencer's monitor blinked and then everything that was FBI related was being downloaded. His computer was under attack. Spencer let loose a series of expletives as everyone's monitors went on the fritz. Zora had just turned the corner into the bullpen, when she saw the warning message appear on Spencer Reid's monitor. It was a death notice, one fatal key stroke and everything could go kaput, Spencer backed away from the computer and looked over at Emily who was staring at her screen.

"Where in the hell is Garcia?" Emily asked as she got up from her desk.

Zora stood in silence and watched as the fifth floor of the BAU broke down, she quickly made it to the tech pool, dropped the laptop off and went on to the rest room. When she returned to the bullpen, Penelope Garcia and the rest of the tech pool was standing before the director who was having a fit. Zora side sat on the edge of Derek's old desk and waited to hear what the execution was going to be. She sat in silence as everyone sat there confused about how to handle the situation. Zora rolled her eyes as she stood slowly.

"I think it was an inside job." Zora stated as all eyes turned on her.

"Agent Cain, what makes you say that?"

"It's too many layers of security. It would've taken weeks for them to do that. They should've put out a trace by then.

"There are always backdoors," Penelope mumbled.

"The quickest way to get caught, that's why we put them there," Zora responded back. "Point I'm trying to make, any tech analyst could've done this."

"Who are you?" Penelope asked.

"Zora Cain, Head of West Coast Field Operations, but you know me as Jacqsintherow, Ladytrinib.

Penelope's eyes widened as she stared at her, "You're Jacqsintherow?"

"Yes, I am."

Penelope's eyes hardened. "You're the reason I'm here."

Zora smiled, "Yes, I am."

Zora turned from her and looked back at the Director. "If you give me access to a computer we can get this all squared away.

"You make this sound so easy," Erin Strauss stated as she leaned against the railing.

Zora just smiled, "With my supreme genius it is."

Within minutes Zora had access to a computer and she slowly retraced the code of the virus. She had managed to figure out the origin of the code and she had had found the failsafe, the backdoor into the program. It had taken her 3 hours, but she had with the help of the tech pool restored much of the system data.

Zora stood slowly and turned to face Penelope Garcia who has just leaned back in her chair. They had been working quietly in Garcia's lair, sifting and sorting through the damage done. Zora reached into her bag and handed Penelope a card.

"If you ever need a change a scenery. Call me, I'm sure we can make some things happen." Zora replied as she gathered her belongings.

Penelope looked at the card and sat it down on the desk.

"And Garcia? If you can't reach me, you can always ask for Derek Morgan."

Zora didn't say another word, she just walked out the door and shut it behind her.

* * *

_She stood in shock; her mouth slacked as she looked at him in all his glory. She was seated on the edge of the bed, her light complexion seemingly tanned under the dim lights of the room. She was partially naked, dressed only in a demi cup bra, garter's and thigh highs. She licked her lips slowly, invitingly as he stepped closer to her. She tilted her head back as he leaned down to kiss her. Penelope leaned back and Derek traveled with her molding himself on top of her. His lips moved from her lips to her ear allowing her to release a sigh of satisfaction._

_ "God, your beautiful," he murmured as his fingers moved to unclasp the fasteners of her bra._

_ Penelope didn't say a word as his hands moved to cup her breast, his tongue slowly making a path down to her nipples._

_ "You know what's odd? Penelope, you taste like candy," Derek cooed as he nipped down on her left nipple. "And I don't even like candy, but there is something about you baby that is undeniable._

_ He went back to his nursing, his tongue making circles around each nipple before he sucked the turgid points into his mouth. He took his time feasting on her breast as if the held all of the sustenance he needed. And when he got her breast just the way he like them, he moved southward. His tongue dallying in her belly button as his fingers slid inside her wet silken box. _

_ Penelope bucked against his fingers Derek moved down. He removed his hands and spread her legs, his eyes focused slowly on her. He lifted a finger before he traced the outline of her vaginal lips._

_ He smiled down at her appreciatively, "Baby, you have such a pretty pussy."_

_ Penelope felt her insides melt as he parted her lips and slid his tongue inside of her. She squealed as his tongue slid up, his mouth clamping down on her clit as he cuffed his fingers inside of her. He felt her walls contract, felt her back lift up off the bed and he did not stop his attack on her body. He continued licking and sucking, enjoying Penelope's taste coating his tongue, the feel of her hands on his head as she bucked her hips upwards towards his awaiting tongue. And as she slipped into the final moments of her orgasm, Derek stepped back and watched her take that ride by herself. _

_ She screamed bloody murder as her pussy contracted. Derek stood there watching her shatter into a million pieces. He eased back onto the bed and lined himself up just right as he slide slowly inside of her._

_ "Derek, " she panted. "We can't do this."_

_ Derek looked up at her as fought his control. The slower he went the harder it was for him not to slam all the way home. Derek stopped himself before going further. He just stared down at her in confusion._

_ "Derek, you're too big!"_

_ Derek laughed as he kissed her nose, "Trust me, I'm not too big. We're going to fit just right."_

_ And without another word Derek slid slowly inside of her, Penelope lifted her legs to wrap them around Derek, pulling him in deeper. Penelope tilted her head up and sighed as Derek brought his head down to rest on hers. He smiled as he began to softly kiss her._

_ "You're perfect Mama," he whispered softly against her lips, "in fact you're the only one for me."

* * *

_

_May 15th_

_San Francisco, California_

Derek was quiet as he stared across the table at Zora. He hadn't said a word, but the rage that was building inside of him was quite apparent. Zora leaned back in her chair and smiled. She knew that Derek was angry, but she didn't care. She simply sat back and waited for him to respond.

"You offered her a job." Derek said slowly.

Zora rocked back in her chair, "Yep."

"What the hell were you thinking?"

"That she's one of the best technical analyst in the Bureau. You and I both know that. I only work with the best, why do I think I offered you a job?"

Derek raised an eyebrow, "My charming good-looks and dashing personality?'

Zora smirked, "Hi, have you met my husband? I get all that and then some at home."

"Neither here nor there; you offered Penelope a job, working out of my office. That's unacceptable."

"What's unacceptable is that you're being insubordinate, Derek. A job was offered, yes. Does it mean she's going to get it, but to just fill you in, she's better than any of the other candidates. And quite frankly, I don't give a damn about your feelings towards her. If she's hired you'd be her boss and as such you still need to interview her."

"Zora, I'm not interviewing her."

Zora rose to her feet, "Then got damnit, Derek quit. But understand you will never work for the FBI as long as I'm alive. "

"You'd blacklist me?"

"Derek, you do not want to test me. You have until lunch time to decide what you're going to do."

"That's two hours away."

"Then I guess you have some thinking to do."

_May 16th_

Penelope pulled her car into the driveway and sighed. She stared out at the beautiful house and wondered if she was doing the right thing. It didn't matter much at this point in time, she mused as she got out of the car. She had work she had to do. She had to confront her past, so she could move forward. She placed one foot in front of the other and as she raised her hand to knock on the door she froze. What in the hell was she going to say? Before she could say a word the door opened and she was face to face with Derek.

She drank him in; took in his beautiful bronzed skin, succulent lips and warm brown eyes. She slightly smiled as she looked at cap of soft curly black hair that was covering his head. She tilted her head and wondered what their baby would've looked like. Would her baby be closer to her rose-petal cream complexion or to Derek's mocha skin tone? Would the baby have the deep dimples of both parents? What about the widow's peak or the hitchhiker's thumb of Derek's? Or those beautifully thickly arched eyebrows? Would there baby have brown or black hair? Curly or straight? All of these questions Penelope had and she couldn't answer.

She closed her eyes and felt the tears begin to sting. She looked back at him and gave him a watery smile.

"Derek, I'm sorry." She managed to get out, " I am so, so, sorry. Please forgive me."

Derek didn't say a word he just pulled Penelope into his arms and held her. He whispered softly to her, trying his best to keep her tears under control, but she let everything out. She bawled into his chest and Derek moved them from his front porch into the living room, where he lifted her and carried her over to the couch.

He sat down and pulled her closer to him. A part of him wanted to hate her, hate what they had, hate what they had become. And yet as he held her he fell back into their norm. And it sucked, because he knew no matter how hard he tried to forget Penelope and ignore her she would always be a part of him. She was his first love.

She lifted her head and met his gaze. "I lost our baby."

It was the first time she had said those words, the first time she had readily admitted to herself that she had lost her child. She hadn't told anyone about her miscarriage, simply because she didn't have the opportunity to relish in her pregnancy. She had known, consciously known ,she was pregnant for only an hour. And now she had spoken the truth to him and it hurt her to know that before he could know he was a father, their baby was taken away.

Derek just stared at her, his silence golden, but his eyes told another story. She could read the anger that was there, but there was also sadness, depression, hurt and underneath it was love.

Derek kissed her forehead, "The doctor told me when I arrived."

A new surge of tears welled up in her eyes. It was official, she had to be the worst person on the face of this earth. Derek sighed as he wiped her tears away. She tilted her head up to face him.

"I wanted to tell you, I just never got the chance. I found out the day of the accident."

Derek cleared his throat as he looked down at her, "Thank you for telling me, P. You don't know how much that means to me."

Penelope didn't say a word she just sighed as she laid her head on his chest and listened to his heartbeat. The strength in its cadence lulled her to sleep.


	6. Chapter 6: Trouble on the Home Front

**A/N: Okay...so it's been taking me a while to add, partially because I decided to read all of the Morgan/Garcia Fanfiction and because I keep thinking of scenes for another Morgan/Garcia story that I'm NOT trying to write. Anywho, sit back and relax and please enjoy today's second installment!**

**Ciao**

**~C.C~**

Disclaimer: I don't own Criminal Minds, I just own my ideas and my thoughts, and they're pretty f'in hot!

**

* * *

**

**Chapter 6: Trouble on the Home front **

_Twenty –Eight Years Earlier_

_San Francisco, CA_

_May 28__th_

It was decided that Penelope would not take the job in San Francisco. She had made her peace with Derek, but she needed to move on to make her relationship with Kevin work. And yet as she sat next to Derek in Zora's office, she wasn't prepared for the counter offer that was laid on the table and the sad part was that she couldn't refuse it.

"I beg your pardon?" Penelope questioned.

"I said that you're on loan from the BAU." Zora replied

"What if I don't want to be on loan?"

"Then you can head back to Quantico and finish serving out your sentence."

Penelope lifted her perfectly arched eyebrows, "That's it?"

Zora simply nodded, "However if you do the temporary transfer, you'd be done. Free to live the way you want to live."

Penelope just stared at Zora her mouth agape. Zora was offering her freedom. Penelope took a deep breath and sighed.

"May I have some time to think about it?"

"Sure." Zora said as she rose to her feet, her pregnant belly more pronounced than ever. "I can give you two days. After that, the deals off the table."

Penelope slowly nodded, "Okay, two days."

"Please enjoy the rest of your time here in California, Ms. Garcia. I look forward to hearing your answer. "

Penelope just smile, "Yes ma'am. You have a wonderful day."

Both Penelope and Derek rose and headed towards the door. Zora watched carefully as the door closed behind them and they headed down the hall. She kicked off her pumps, sank down in her seat, as she grabbed the phone and pressed a button.

"Hotchner," Aaron Hotchner spoke into the phone.

"Hotch, this is Zora Cain. I placed the deal on the table."

Aaron looked down into the bullpen at the non-laughing faces of his team. "What did she say?"

"She has two days to mull it over."

"I see."

Zora sighed as she sat back, "He's trying to out maneuver me."

"Are you sure you should be doing this?" Aaron asked.

"I'm fine, it's just personal for me. Anyway, I'll be in to brief your team at 7 am. I'm flying in tonight."

" Zora, you know you should never take things to personal."

Zora looked up and smiled. "He took my only daughter from me, Aaron. My first child. I can't help but to take it personal."

"Zora-"

"In this job we atone for our sins every day and he has yet to atone for his."

Hotch sighed into the phone, "I'll see you in the morning."

"See you then."

Zora dropped the phone into the cradle as she turned towards her monitors. Her eyes scanned the monitors with great care as she looked for something to stand out. And there in the midst of it all, she found what she was looking for. She accessed the file, writing her way into the program just as the author was adjusting it. She smiled to herself as she finally got what she wanted and needed.

* * *

_May 29th_

_FBI Headquarters_

_Quantico, Virginia_

Zora entered the BAU conference room with her husband, Malcolm hot on her heels. All eyes turned to him as she began to set shop. With little indifference to the team, Malcolm removed his jacket and helped Zora set up, before pushing himself into the corner. Five minutes after the hour Zora began her briefing.

She made it plain and simple, Penelope Garcia's life was in danger and the person who was trying to kill her worked out of the FBI offices in Quantico. Zora presented all of her evidence factually, in the order that she found it. She was precise, she was accurate, she was scary.

"How do you know it's him?" Emily Prentiss asked.

"You mean besides the fact that he never came to the hospital and lied about his whereabouts?" Malcolm stated from the corner, "Banking transactions, phone calls to the U.S. Embassy in Colombia and the one little thing that everyone keeps glossing over, Penelope's pregnancy."

J.J sat up straight, "Penelope's pregnant?"

All eyes were on Malcolm, "What does Pen pregnancy have to do with anything?" Emily Prentiss asked.

"Pen's pregnancy has everything to do with this." Malcolm said with much emphasis., "To hurt a man, you must find what he holds dear and true to his heart. And once you find out what it is, you use that to your advantage. To crumble your opponent and make them pay."

"Why would he hurt Pen, he loves her?" J.J. asked casually.

"Yeah, but not the way Morgan loves her." Reid replied with a laugh. A slight chuckle went up before J.J. sat up.

"Pen was carrying Derek's baby?" J.J. asked.

"Men, like Derek try so hard not to settle down, they try like hell to never have kids, to never have families, because what they do, who they are is not conducive for a home life." Zora replied softly. "If he had known, he would've left this life. The goal was for him to never see his child and in that they succeeded."

"Who wants to hurt Morgan?" Reid asked.

"I cannot answer that, because I don't know." Zora said, "I just know the threat exists."

"So, how do we know that you're telling the truth."

"She's not ranked high enough to see that kind of classified information." Malcolm stated.

"And you are?" Emily presumed.

"This is my case, Agent Prentiss. I went outside of my agency to get help from her, because she's one of the best in the business and she understands what it means to keep quiet."

"You're CIA." Reid stated softly.

"I'm an independent operative. I choose whom I work with." Malcolm Cain said quietly. "And I choose to work with you."

"I just don't understand why Pen can't stay here."

Malcolm grimaced," Penelope unearthed some classified information when she was a hacker. That's when they had Zora in the tech pool. She followed Penelope, studied her every move and ended up writing her in a box. Both she and Penelope read and accessed files that were shared between the FBI and CIA. "

"Why… can't…PG…stay?" Emily asked punctuating each word.

"Because it's a got damn war zone with a bounty of a million dollars on her fucking head, that's why she can't stay." Malcolm roared. " You are less than 50 miles away from the capital with people from various countries with diplomatic immunity that can easily wipe Penelope off the grid. She's accessible and your people can't be trusted."

"And we can't transfer the entire team, to California. It's too many risk factors. Especially since Aaron and Jennifer have children." Zora interjected.

"Why do you say we can't be trusted?"

Zora stared at Spencer Reid for a long moment before turning to the monitors. She sat down a moment before she begin to type within moments an e-mail popped up sent from the director. Spencer moved to closed stop Zora's hand when she opened it.

"Looks familiar?" Zora asked.

All eyes were on her as a dialogue box popped open and she entered a passcode. The screen changed to the background for the FBI desktop. She selected a floating scroll icon and clicked creating another dialogue box, she typed in Spencer's Reid's name. And everything that he had done prior to and after the virus attack was all appearing. She had discreetly copied and recorded his files.

"You did this?"

Zora simply smiled and nodded, "Yeah, it's my masterpiece.

"Aren't they going to be able to trace it back?"

Zora cocked her head to the side, "Sure you can trace it, just not back to me."

"You know it's against the law to do this?" Emily said.

"It would've been if I hadn't had orders from the President to create and test the program; on all governmental branches. Besides, I needed to make sure that we weren't mistaken about this. So I hacked into the tech pool and look what we found here. "

It was footage taken from the day that Penelope was run down. Zora played it and all you could see, is Penelope bracing herself for the impact, her arms protectively around her waist, and her body flying up in the air. Zora paused the tape and zoomed in on the license plate. Then she ran license plate data soft wear next to it. The plate and truck was registered to Kevin Lynch.

"Anybody could've stolen Lynch's truck," Emily said as she stared up at the screen.

"Do you even like Penelope?" Zora asked as she stared at Emily.

"What kind of question is that?"

"A simple one. I just need to know, because as far as I'm concerned you don't give a damn about her. "  
"With all due respect, how do we know that you didn't set Penelope Garcia up. You just walk in here and tell us, that we're supposed to let PG go, cause you say so." Emily retorted. "It doesn't work like that."

"Let me explain something to you Emily Prentiss, if I decided to kill Penelope Garcia, I wouldn't have used an SUV. In fact I just wouldn't have just targeted her, I would've targeted your entire team. There wouldn't have been any survivors. Secondly, if I say jump, it is in your best interest to say how high. Because believe me when I say, not even David Rossi, can sweet talk his way out of this."

Zora closed shut down set-up without another words, when she finished her work she turned her attention on Hotch.

"No matter what Penelope's decision will be, you all have been assigned a new tech, Rhyse Legend."

"We don't want a new tech, we want Penelope." Emily retorted back.

"And I want Penelope alive. Guess who's want trumps yours Agent Prentiss."

The tension in the air was high and there was one thing that was certain, and it was Zora Cain wasn't backing down by any means. And that in itself was enough to set Malcolm off. Malcolm cleared his throat before he turned his attention to J.J.

"Ms. Jaureau could you please escort Agent Cain, to Director McNeil's office?"

It was not a request, but a thinly veld demand. Malcolm placed his hands on Zora's shoulder, reeling her back in. He pulled her close to him, briefly, giving enough of himself to calm her down before sending her off to meet one of the big bosses. Once she had composed herself she turned and without another word left the room.

Malcolm watched as Zora walked down the hall with J.J. And when he could no longer see her, he turned and locked the door. He leaned against the door and stared at Emily Prentiss.

"I'm going to make this very, very clear. Back the hell off, Agent Prentiss. I get it. You want your team here, safe and sound. And I want my wife back in California safe and sound. I understand it, but you have to understand that this isn't about you or about this team. This is about Penelope and Derek. And if you can't get over yourself then do us all the favor of removing yourself from this team."

"How dare you-"

Malcolm hit the table, " How dare I what, Agent Prentiss? Question your sincerity? Because I have a lot more riding on this then you do. My whole life is based on keeping Penelope Garcia safe and I have no problems getting rid of complications."

"Are you threatening me?"

Malcolm gave Emily his patent heartbreaker smile, "One thing you will learn about me, Emily Prentiss is that I don't make threats. I make and deliver promises."

Malcolm rose to his full height and put back on his suit jacket, before unlocking the door. He picked up his bag and turned back to Emily, "Please don't have me deliver on that promise."

"Mr. Cain, do not threaten my Agents." Aaron Hotchner stated, his tone cool and direct.

Malcolm shook his head and smiled before he laughed, "My Angel, was right you are one ballsy individual, Agent Hotchner, I like that. I like that a lot. " He stopped laughing, " I will not have anyone, friend or foe compromising the safety of Penelope Garcia. I am a problem solver, my job is to eliminate problems. I am telling you and your team, do not become a problem for me. "

* * *

It was hours later, when Zora and Malcolm were boarding their private jet back home, that they were actually allowed to talk about the day's events. Zora was lying across the couch her feet placed in her husband's lap as he gently gave her a foot massage. Zora shifted in her seat to stare at her husband who was looking intently at the movie screen.

"What are we going to do about Penelope?" Zora asked.

Malcolm sighed as he looked at her, " We're going to protect her, Love."

"Malcolm, when did it all get so complicated?" Zora whined as she sat up.

Malcolm tapped her chin, turning her head towards him. He kissed her softly, before pulling onto his lap. "Listen, it's all going to work out fine."

"How can we be so sure? There's no guarantee that Penelope is going to stay in California. And if Derek finds out about this, he's going to go bezerk. I'm already on his shit list for insinuating that I'm going to hire her, Malcolm."

"Hey, Hardhead, calm the hell down! Penelope's going to stay in Cali, and Derek's going to stop being angry with you."

"How are you going to guarantee that?"

Malcolm just smiled, "Don't you worry about that, you just let me take care of that."

* * *

_May 30th_

_San Francisco, CA_

_Cain Entereprises_

_Office of the CEO- Malcolm J. Cain_

Per Malcolm's request, Zora had invited both Penelope and Derek to join her and Malcolm for lunch at Cain Enterprises. Initially, Derek was all set to turn down the invitation until Malcolm had called and practically threatened to drag him down to Cain Enterprises himself. So, at one that afternoon Penelope and Derek stepped off the Elevator on to the fifth floor of the building to be greeted by Madeline.

"Welcome to Cain Enterprises, Ms. Garcia and Mr. Morgan. Mr. and Mrs. Cain will be with you shortly." Madeline said with a reaffirming smile. "If you please follow me, we can get you settled in before they arrive."

Without another word, Madeline turned and Derek and Penelope followed them down the hall. Madeline came to a stop in front of a set of beautiful beveled glass doors. She unlocked, the doors and led them into the atrium that over looked the lobby of Cain Enterprises and the beautiful rose gardens in the front of the building.

"If you need anything else please let me know," Madeline replied with another smile before walking out of the room.

Penelope stepped further into the room and looked at the table. It sat six but was covered with a beautiful white and gold trimmed linen table cloth. On top sat place settings of four, of the highest quality china and crystal. Penelope smiled slightly before turning to Derek.

"Does she always do this when she's hiring someone?"

Derek grimaced as he stared at the table, "This isn't Zora's doing. It's Malcolm's."

"Malcolm?"

Derek touch the flowers on the table gingerly, "Yeah, Zora's husband. He's up to something."

"How do you know that?"

Derek's gaze finally met hers, "I just know."

The doors open immediately and Madeline stepped in with a concerned look on her face. "Agent Morgan, Ms. Garcia could you please follow me."

Derek had seen the look on Madeline's face before and he knew that something had went terribly wrong. Derek followed Madeline who was practically sprinting to her desk in her stiletto's. She stopped suddenly and retrieved an envelope and a heavy platinum briefcase. She handed both to Derek.

"What is this?" Derek asked.

Madeline grabbed the two rolling suitcases from under her desk and quickly walked to the elevators, "Your briefing. The helicopter on the roof is waiting to take you to the airstrip."

"My briefing? Madeline, I don't work for Cain Enterprises."

Madeline didn't even slow down as she punched in the code to the roof top. As the elevator doors opened, she pulled the suitcases on and stared Derek in the face. " You can discuss that with your boss, when you get to the airstrip."

"Madeline, what happened?"

Madeline stepped closer to Derek and looked dead at Penelope, "If you ever loved Zora, you'd marry Penelope."

Derek head whipped around at Madeline, who was keeping the doors of the elevator open, "After you, Ms. Garcia."

Penelope stepped on the elevator and Madeline stepped back inside shutting the doors manually. The ride up to the roof was uneventful, but that all stopped the moment that roof doors open. Madeline moved quickly, rolling the suitcases on to the tarmac and ducking her head down to load the helicopter. Derek grabbed a hold to Penelope and loaded her up on to the helicopter. And within minutes they were off.

Derek didn't have time to look at case, because they had quickly descended on the private air strip that was connected to Cain land. The propellers of the helicopter stopped spinning and everyone unloaded. Derek and Penelope were wisked off to the awaiting plane that had literally just rolled on to the tarmac, the doors opened and a blood soaked Malcolm stood at the entrance.

"Oh my God," Penelope uttered.

"What the hell happened to you?" Derek asked as he approached the steps.

Malcolm didn't say a word he just waved them on to the plane. They stepped up cautiously and watched as Malcolm walked away from the door. As they entered the cabin, Derek's eyes adjusted to see his oldest god-son Jamison sleeping soundly on one of the chairs. Malcolm kept walking until they were in the back of the plane. Zora was cradling her twin boys Malcolm Jr. and Marcus in her arms. She was singing softly to them as tears streamed down her face.

"Have a seat," Malcolm motioned to Derek and Penelope.

"Mal, Zora what's going on?" Derek asked as he sat down across from Zora.

Zora lowered her voice, her words losing their smooth sexiness. "Everything has backfired. They broke into the system while we were in the air. They went after my babies."

Malcolm placed his hands on her shoulder, "Baby,-"

Zora snatched away as she pushed herself up while holding on to her boys, " Don't touch me."

Malcolm sighed as he reached for Marcus and Zora sidestepped him. "Don't touch my kids, either."

Derek shot out of his seat and stepped between Zora and Malcolm. He faced Malcolm giving Zora the barrier and the time she needed to walk away. The anger that radiated from Malcolm was intoxicating. Derek knew that if had to truly come to it, they would fight to the death.

"What the hell is going on?" Derek asked.

Malcolm didn't respond, he just clinched his fist together and waited for Zora to return. She appeared a few minutes later, more composed and angry as ever. She sat down and stared at Penelope before motioning for Derek to have a seat. Derek moved slowly away from Malcolm before taking his seat. Malcolm turned abruptly and walked away.

"What the hell is going on?" Derek asked again.

Zora reached for her seat belt and sighed. "Buckle up, for safety please."

"Zora,-"

Zora raised her hand to silence Derek, "I will tell you when we get in the air."

Within minutes they were air bound and Malcolm was back. He didn't sit behind Zora, he stood behind her, like a silent sentry commanding his post.

"Zora, what the hell is going on?" Derek asked his temper barely being held in check.

"You can't stay in California, " Zora said softly. "And Penelope you can't go back to Quantico."

"Why the hell not?" Penelope asked indignantly.

"When you hacked into the FBI database you extracted a file of tremendous proportions. The file is called Exodus." Zora replied as her fingers tapped the arm rest.

Derek looked from Zora to Penelope. " You've got to be shitting me? Pen cracked Exodus?"

Zora shook her head, "I let her crack Exodus, Derek."

"Why?"

Zora simply shrugged,"I need her prowess."

Penelope sat up straight, " You set me up."

Zora smirked, "Of course I set you up. You were a legend and I need you on the right side of the law. It was my last act as a technical analyst of the BAU, I had to find someone I could trust. And I trusted you Penelope."

"You don't even know me to trust me!" Penelope screamed at her.

"You never told anyone what you saw in Exodus did you? In fact you never even read the Exodus file."

"How do you know that?" Penelope asked as she leaned back in her seat.  
"Because if you had told, Derek wouldn't be here," Zora replied.

"What happened?" Derek asked as he sat up.

"Six months ago a red flag was sent to my computer, someone opened Exodus. I traced it back to Quantico and to Penelope's servers. Only problem was that Penelope wasn't at Quantico, Derek. In fact Penelope didn't have access to any computers where she was."

"And how do you know that?" Penelope asked.

Malcolm finally spoke, "Because when I designed Trinity, I purposely designed it so there wouldn't be an electronic signal to penetrate its forces."

"Fine, I didn't open Exodus. What the hell does it have to do with me?"

Derek turned to look at Penelope, "Remember when I told you I worked undercover for 18 months?" Penelope just nodded. " I was an operative for the CIA before I was accepted into the BAU. The file was sealed, encoded in the FBI database, and it was to never show on my file."

Penelope's eyes closed as she took a deep breath, "Derek, you're Exodus."

"No, baby, Malcolm and I are both Exodus."

"What does that mean?"

Malcolm took a deep breath, "It means that we're on the run."


	7. Chapter 7: Mr and Mrs Morgan

A/N: It's been almost a year since I started writing this story. I know I may not say it much, I may not even say it as often as you may deserve, but I do want you to know that I do appreciate you all reading and commenting on my stories. You guys rock!

* * *

**Chapter 7: Mr. and Mrs. Morgan**

_Twenty-Eight Years Earlier_

_November 24th_

_Grosse Pointe Farms, MI_

It was Thanksgiving, one of those holidays that Penelope felt should be spent with all of your loved ones. Yet, she and Derek were stuck together making it work. On the outside looking in they were the perfect family. Derek and Penelope Morgan had been married for six months. Derek was practicing law and Penelope owned an antique's shop. They had a beautiful sprawling home that was set upon Lake Shore Dr. with a dock that was attached to the property.

All in all, they fit into suburban life well, but there was something that was missing between them. And it just happened to Spencer Reid who addressed the issue as he was setting the dinner table for their Thanksgiving dinner.

"Are you guys sure you want to do this?" Spencer asked as he adjusted the decorative linen on the table.

Derek looked up from the water glasses he was sitting on the table, "It's just dinner, Reid. We'll be fine."

Jamison shook his head, "You do know you have to kiss her, right?"

"Kiss, who?"

"Ms. P."

"And why would I do that?"

Jamison stared at his god-father in disgust. "Because you're married and that's what married people do."

Derek raised a heavily arched eyebrow as Jamison stared back at him, "How do you know I haven't kissed her already?"

"Besides, asking me why you would do that. She's not having a baby."

"Jamison-"

"I know how babies get here, I had the conversation with Dad." Jamison replied with a shake of his head. "Kissing leads to how babies get here. And as much as my parents kiss, you notice we always have a baby in our house."

Derek laughed heartily at that. It was true, it seemed that every time he turned around Zora and Malcolm were having a baby, making a baby, talking about making and having a baby. At nine, Jamison was way more mature then Derek could ever remember himself being. And that in itself was a good thing, Jamison knew and understood more than the average nine year old, which meant having him around was invaluable. However, Derek knew that Jamison was missing home. He draped an arm around his god-son and pulled him close.

"You miss your mom, huh, kiddo?" Derek said softly.

Jamison just smiled, "Yeah, I do. I miss my brothers and I want to see Kaeden and Kaleal.

Derek sighed so much had changed in the past six months. Malcolm was off venturing across Europe, not allowed to have any contact with his children; Zora was left to fend for herself- giving birth to another set of identical twin boys, Kaeden and Kaleal, alone and raising Malcolm Jr. and Marcus, as she managed to juggle her job with the FBI and being Chairman of Cain Enterprises. Derek and Penelope had settled into their pseudo-suburban life together and Jamison was forced to tag along with them, because he was supposed to have died in that car bombing. Derek knew that none of them could ever go home, until whoever was after them was caught.

"You'll be going home soon, Jay."

Jamison looked up at Derek and smiled, "Yeah. Soon. Right."

Jamison stepped away and finished setting the table in silence. Derek decided to leave Jamison alone and check on Penelope. He pushed the kitchen door open to see Penelope adding the finish touches to the dressing. Derek wrapped his arms around her waist and planted a soft kiss on her cheek.

"Smells wonderful Baby Girl," Derek whispered in her ear as he took a sample of the dressing.

"DEREK!" She exclaimed as she popped him with the spoon.

He just smiled, "Force of habit, used to do it with my mom all the time."

"Yeah, I just bet." She pushed him off of her as she lifted the turkey and placed it back in the roaster.

Derek looked around the kitchen and smirked to himself. The kitchen table, the stove and the island was full of food. He turned his gaze on Penelope who had put the turkey and dressing back in the oven and was now standing by the stove stirring a batch of greens. Derek's eyebrow went up at the smell of the greens and smirked.

"Collards?"

Penelope smiled, "Okay, so we both know I'm not the world's greatest cook, but with Zora's video tutorials and the recipe box she gave me, I think I've done a great job."

"Can I try them?"

Penelope shrugged and handed him the spoon, He pulled a bit off and chewed thoughtfully. He put the spoon down and closed the lid and then turned the stove off. Penelope's eyes went up in alarm.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing's wrong. Listen why don't you go upstairs and freshen up, while I finish off dinner."

Penelope folded her arms across her ample chest and smirked. " I didn't know you knew how to cook."

Derek chuckled, "When Zora was pregnant with Jami, she made it her mission to make me a suitable cook. She said that if anything happened to her she needed to know that her baby was going to be well fed, to her satisfaction. And since I was the only elected god-parent I had to learn how to cook and fast."

"So, you mean to tell me that all this time I've been slaving over a hot stove, you could've been in here cooking for me."

"Baby, you say the word and I promise to make you a wonderful meal." Derek replied with a smile.

"I think I like that preposition," Penelope said with a smile.

"Good. Go ahead and do that thing you know I like."

"What thing?"

"You know, that thing that makes you most beautiful woman I ever met in my life."

"Ever the charmer," Penelope smiled as she walked out of the room.

Penelope walked towards the spiraled staircase, when she spotted Jamison sitting on the edge of the coffee table. She had often found Jamison sitting quietly to himself staring off into space as if he was searching for answers that no one else could see. Penelope cleared her throat before walking into the living room.

"Dear Heart, are you okay?"

Jamison turned his pale green eyes on Penelope and shook his head. Penelope kneeled in front of him. She stared into his beautiful bronzed face and wondered briefly if her Derek's baby would've been as beautiful as Jamison. She quickly blinked away her thoughts and cradled his face in her hands.

"What's wrong, Jay?"

"I wonder if she's thinking of me," Jamison said quietly.

Penelope raised an eyebrow, "She?"

Jamison just shook his head, "My mom. I know she's probably busy trying to keep everything normal, I miss her."

Penelope put her hand to her mouth, " I'm sorry Jay."

Jamison shrugged, "There's nothing you can do about I, Ms. P. It's just the first time I won't be spending Christmas with my parents. You know no matter what my parents were working on, they always spent holidays together. It was their unspoken rule."

Penelope just pulled Jamison into her arms as she kissed his cheek. "I'm sure wherever your parents are they are thinking of you."

They looked like the perfect family, one unidentifiable perfect family. Derek had grown his hair out and it was a mass of flowing curls. He had lost his tan, his skin a beautiful light golden brown and he gained a good twenty pounds, which looked quite good on him. Derek even started wearing glasses, which Penelope thought to be hilarious. He looked the part of a sexy nerd ,which garnered Derek some considerable second looks. Penelope had colored her hair auburn and permed it giving her hair silken curls. She had lost a considerable 40 pounds and was very unhappy about it. She even tanned her skin, giving the illusion that she was visibly more Latina, then she really was. And Jamison, ironically, looked to be the perfect mixture of the two. He was the color of golden honey, with shockingly pale green eyes that he had inherited from his mother's side of the family. His dark brown tresses hung past his shoulders in thick curling waves. He was big for his age, he stood at 5'0" and he was physically fit. In essence he was a mini version of his father.

However, Jamison played the role of obedient son to Penelope and Derek as they entertained their holiday guest. Everything was going fine, until one of the obnoxious neighbor's children asked the wrong question.  
"So, what are you?"

Jamison didn't say anything, he just glanced at the boy before turning his attention back to the book of _Mice and Men_. Jamison, adjusted his glasses, before turning the next page. Jamison's movements, were clear indicators of his boredom, was taken as disrespectful by the kid before him and the next thing, Jamison knew his book was being thrown across the room and his reading glasses snatched off his face.

"I asked you a question, what are you?"

Jamison just stared at the boy before shaking his head, "I'm human."

The answer was one that Malcolm had taught his son early on. Outward appearances placed both, Malcolm and Zora, as African-American, but Zora was quick to tell people the non-PC answer. She was Creole: Black, White, Lakota and Muscogee Indian. However, she self-identifed as Black. Malcolm on the other hand, embraced everything that he was, which was Black, Seminole and _mestizo _– Spanish and Aztec Indian. And by embracing all that he was, he also embraced each culture, which had a tendency to conflict greatly with his job interest. Yet, the confliction made Malcolm who and what he was. He consciously, insisted on raising his children to be who and what they were, which in essence was human.

Jamison's answer no matter how honest, was not the one the thirteen year old boy wanted to hear and without a thought he snatched Jamison up by his shirt, before he popped him one good time. Moments later a scream was heard followed by glass shattering. Derek stopped his conversation and took off towards the scream.

Penelope, who was in the kitchen stopped placing hors d'oeurs on the trays and stepped into the hallway just as Derek walked past the door. She moved to the door and watched him as he walked into the den. And it seemed as soon as he walked in, all of the children walked out and ran directly to their parents. Without a second thought Penelope moved into the den, to see a large piece of glass sticking out of Jamison's chest.

"Derek, Jami?" She asked as she stepped closer.

Derek looked up at her his brown eyes pleading, "Don't come in here, P. Just call the ambulance."

Penelope held her composure and made the 911 call. Everything else was a big blur. She didn't even notice her neighbors leave, she just kept vigil in the hallway, singing softly to calm Jamison down. And when the ambulance came, she escorted the EMS crew to her den. Answered all the police officers questions; and gave them all of their neighbors name, did she acknowledge the fact that she was numb.

It wasn't until hours later, when reality set in. She stood in the waiting room of the O.R pacing back and forth, when Derek came through the doors.

"How is he? Is he okay?" Penelope asked as she made her way to him.

"Jay's fine. They're moving him tonight."

"Moving him where?" Penelope asked him as she stared him in the face.

"Children's Hospital. He'll have his own private room, with around the clock security."

"Is he awake now?"

Derek nodded, "Yeah."

"Can I see him?"

At that not Derek shook his head, " We can't see him."

Penelope looked up at Derek in confusion, " Why not?"

He took her face in his hands and kissed the bridge of her nose, "You have to go home, Penelope."

His words were slow and deliberate. He looked at her with sadness sitting in his eyes. She understood his words and when he pulled her into him, he left her with a set of explicit instructions. He was sending her away,he wasn't sure that Jamison going through that table was an accident. He had to be reassured. So he was sending her to Chicago.

She tilted her head up and kissed his chin, "Ok, I'll go home."

And then Derek did and said something that confused her, he pulled her close to him and placed his hands on her stomach, "I want you to wait for me, no heavy lifting, baby girl. I just want you to curl up on the couch and watch Bones. I know that's your favorite."

Penelope opened her mouth to protest when he kissed her softly on the lips before whispering, "Just do it, Mama. Don't ask no questions, just do it."

"Mr and Mrs. Morgan?"

Derek looked over her head to see the doctor standing in the doorway. Penelope looked up and over her shoulder. The doctor smiled slightly before nodding his head.

"We're loaded Jamison on to the helicopter and he'll be landing in 15 minutes. His discharge papers are at the nurse's station."

Derek nodded his head and the doctor went back to work. With an arm wrapped around Penelope, Derek made his way to the nurse's station and retrieved Jamison's discharge papers and his file. He handed the paperwork to Penelope and then he guided them to their car and then home. Derek pulled the car into the garage and escorted Penelope into the house.

Within minutes, both Penelope and Derek were back in the car, cruising down Lake Shore Dr. towards Jefferson Ave. Derek looked at his watch, as he crossed the city back tracking his way towards Detroit. He found himself at the cross roads of Mack Ave and Cadieux and proceeded to make his way to I-94, within minutes, Derek was flying doing I-94, switching lanes as he made his way to the I-75 corridor, he headed South and zoomed down the freeway, the silence in the car deafening. Derek finally slowed down as 75 moved south west towards the old Tiger Stadium and Mexican Village. Derek reached into the console of the car and reached for his passport and FBI badge. He did the same for Penelope. He crossed the bridge and as he entered Canada gave all of their information to the border patrol guard.

It took no more than 60 seconds for he and Penelope to be pushed on through. Derek said nothing as he pushed the car on, and roughly thirty minutes later arrived at a beautiful cottage outside of Windsor. Derek pulled up into the driveway to be met by Malcolm.

"How is he?" Malcolm asked Derek .

Derek smirked as he stepped out of the car. "He's fine. Where's Z?"

Malcolm looked back at the house, "She's upstairs asleep. "

Derek looked back at the car to see Penelope staring at the both of them. "I need you to promise me one thing."

"Anything."

"You take care of her. And you make sure that nothing happens to her."

Malcolm looked from Derek to Penelope and nodded his head, "You have my word."


End file.
